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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26911108">Rendemption</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnilyAlways775344/pseuds/2WhoR1'>2WhoR1 (SnilyAlways775344)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Ackbar is alive, Actual Intimacy eventually, Dry Humping, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Ilum was not Starkiller, Mind speech with Force Bond, Post-TRoS, TROS Fix-it sort of, eventually</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 00:16:20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>36,406</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26911108</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SnilyAlways775344/pseuds/2WhoR1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>What will it take for Ben Solo to redeem himself in the eyes of the Resistance?  Become Kylo Ren one last time.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Finn/Rose Tico, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>40</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The Need for Understanding</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Okay, I haven't written a canon verse fic before so bear with me.  I'm currently working on several projects so this may not be updated often.  This picks up at the end of TROS but with a different ending and I've made a few changes to suit the story.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b><em>Understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only with acceptance can there be recovery.</em> </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b> <em>-- JKR, The Goblet of Fire</em> </b>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>“<em> No!  Ben!”  </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>The anguished cries tore from Rey's throat.  The man she had somehow come to love slipped from her arms, a sharp pain squeezing her heart as she felt his life force fading away.  Feeling as if her very own soul had been ripped from her, she attempted to cradle his body close to her, refusing to accept the growing chasm between them.  Laying her head against his chest, she poured out her sorrow, her tears dripping steadily over Ben's still heart.  He'd sacrificed himself – for her.  Now, it was her turn, for she'd rather die than live without him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Determination strengthening her will, Rey searched inside herself for that mystical force she'd become attuned to and reached out to find what remained of Ben's.  Latching onto the last vestiges of it, she pulled.  The Force fought her, seemingly insisting on robbing her of what she desired most, but she hadn't survived everything just to lose it all now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You can't have him!  I won't let you!  He found his true self!  He deserves to live!  You put us together!  Why are you trying to pull us apart?!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Harder and harder she tugged on that little handhold, though it seemed farther and farther away.  She could feel herself tiring but refused to give up.  Just as he slid from her grasp, another surge of the Force pushed him back into her hands, as though someone on the other side had shoved him into her frantically clutching fingers.  A brief flash of … something … filled her before an absolute miracle happened.  The chest beneath her spasmed with an accompanying gasping breath!  Jerking upright, Rey looked into eyes she had thought she'd never see again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey lifted a hand to cup his face but couldn't make contact, too fearful it was a simple hallucination on her part.  In an instant, she discovered it was very real, that Ben was very much alive, when he suddenly sat up and desperately held her close.  Then, he sat back and gifted her with the same smile he had given her mere minutes ago, containing love, joy, and a bit of self-consciousness.  Unable to curb her elation, she cupped his face, her fingers curling in his dark hair, and pressed her lips to his for another desperate kiss.  The touch of him, the taste of him, even the smell of him overwhelmed her, bringing a fresh wave of tears.  He truly was there with her!  Threading her fingers together at the nape of his neck, she leaned her forehead against his.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I thought I'd lost you.  I couldn't bear it.  I couldn't let you go.  Something … some<em> one </em> helped bring you back.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I felt that, too.  I could feel you trying to keep me here but still being pulled away until a huge shove came from the other side.  The next thing I know, I'm awake and aware of everything again.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Oddly, a surge of relief inside her fueled her temper, and Rey gave him a good shake.  “Don't you ever do that to me again!  Do you hear me?  Otherwise, I'll bring you back just to kill you myself!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His full lips curled into that wonderful smile again.  “I hear you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a few moments of simply holding each other, Rey looked around them at the destroyed remnants of the past.  “We should go.”  A few flashes of space battle caught her eye.  “It's over, “ she said as more and more of the First Order ships were destroyed.  “We've won.  Everyone will be heading back to Resistance headquarters soon.  We can meet them there.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As she stood, Ben hesitated, looking up at her.  “I don't know if that's a good idea.  Your friends?  They'll never accept me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey didn't need the Force to tell her what he was feeling.  His eyes said it for him.  Fear.  The fear of rejection.  The fear to hope.  It was a vulnerability that made her love him all the more.  In a gesture very familiar to the two of them, she held out her hand.  “Take it.  You know you want to.  Together, we'll face whatever comes.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The ghost of a smile graced Ben's features, as he echoed her earlier declaration.  “I do want to take your hand.”  He matched gesture to words.  “I'm not sure I like my words thrown back at me, but I must admit, your offer is better than mine ever could have been.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>With his help, Rey helped him to his feet.  As Ben studied their surroundings, Rey took a moment to study <em> him </em>.  She'd never allowed herself to truly appreciate his height or the width of his shoulders.  A shirtless version of him popped into her head from the time they had reconnected through their bond, and she spun around, fighting the heat in her face.  When she felt she could face him again, she did so, only to find him watching her, a somewhat smug expression on his face, as if he had known where her thoughts had gone.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Not wanting to think on the likelihood that he had been very aware of her thoughts or her feelings, Rey cleared her throat and headed back in the direction she thought the ships were, relieved when Ben simply followed her.  It took quite a bit of time navigating around fallen walls and supports to reach the ships they had arrived in.  The thought of leaving Luke's X-wing behind didn't sit too well with her, but what could be done?  The fighter had only one seat.  She supposed she could fly it back while Ben piloted his own ship, but she didn't want to run the risk of the Resistance shooting him out of the sky before she could even transmit a message not to.  And, if she were to be honest with herself, she didn't want to be that far from him.  A sense of peace suddenly flowed through her, as if Luke himself had given his permission to leave it behind.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Please tell me yours is equipped to carry more than one person.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It is.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Then, let's go.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>In fact, Rey discovered the ship had a small bunk and living area despite being classed as a fighter.  After giving Ben the location of the Resistance's headquarters, she watched the barren landscape fall away during lift-off, surveying with pride the destruction of the First Order fleet.  Well, what had fallen to the planet's surface, at any rate.  When it had counted, people had fought for what was right.  She had faith that those people would welcome Ben Solo back into their fold.  Utterly exhausted, Rey settled further into her seat, barely stifling a yawn.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You should rest.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I will – once we're back.  Besides, you may need me to convince the others not to shoot us down.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She received a conceding tilt of his head as he focused on flying.  Despite the shuddering of the ship as they navigated through the turbulent slipstream that led to the Sith planet, Rey could no longer fight her weariness and nodded off.  Sometime later, she felt a subtle shift in the Force, one she had come to associate with her and Ben's connection activating.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We should be there soon.  If you wish to make it to the surface, now would be a good time to wake up.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It struck Rey as a bit odd to actually <em> be </em>in, literally, the same place as Ben when their bond opened, to see exactly what he saw.  It was certainly a new experience.  Then, his words registered in her tired mind.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Already?  I hadn't intended to sleep that long.  You should have awakened me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why?  You needed to rest.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What about you?  Did you sleep?”  She felt his reluctance to answer and knew what his response would be before he spoke.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Some.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You're still worried about their reactions to you being with me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I would be stupid not to be.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Well, they don't know you as I do.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben's serious expression softened slightly as he glanced over at her.  “Wake up, Rey.  We're being hailed.  Time to start transmitting.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The Force shifted again as the connection terminated.  Rey awoke to hear a very threatening warning coming over the comm, familiar Resistance fighters closing in on them.  Quickly acting, she sent out the message that it was, indeed, her aboard the ship, verifying her identity by giving a password that had been set up long ago.  The intercepting fighters veered off and she was welcomed back.  Despite her earlier assurances to Ben, she did feel a little nervous over his reception.  She glanced over to find him watching her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>In a manner that would have made Han proud, Ben asked, “You sure you don't want to just run?  Go anywhere?  Live however you choose?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey's instant response of <em> Not on your life </em> died before it was spoken.  That phrase hit too close to home at the moment, so she settled for a single word.  “No.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yeah, I didn't think so.  You were never much of a runner.  It's too late now anyway.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben brought the ship to a gentle landing, the slightest of bumps indicating they'd hit solid ground.  After running through the landing checklist to shut down the engines, he sat back in his seat, staring straight ahead a few moments before facing her expectantly.  Rey forced her internal emotional unease to calm.  They would accept Ben – and her bond with him – eventually.  They wouldn't be able to keep that a secret.  She and Ben should explore it, learn to use it beyond what they had so far, and learn to block it when necessary.  If her friends couldn't or wouldn't acknowledge the fact that Kylo Ren was dead and welcome Ben Solo, then, there would be nothing holding her to them any longer.  She and Ben could leave and never look back, though it would hurt to say goodbye to the ones she had grown close to.  If it came down to a choice between them, Ben would win every time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You're having second thoughts about bringing me here.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Well, she couldn't deny her anxiety, could she?  “Not about bringing you, no.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben shrugged.  “About them, then.  Amounts to the same thing.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I will concede that they may not be too happy to see you at first, but they <em> will </em> listen to me, and they <em> will </em>come to see Ben rather than Kylo Ren.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey didn't give him a chance to respond further.  The lure of food, a shower and fresh clothes, of a good night's rest, pushed her from her seat to the exit ramp, relieved to hear Ben's steady footsteps behind her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>BR</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben Solo contemplated the turn his life had taken the few moments he had while following Rey to the exit ramp.  A year ago, if he'd been told he'd take up his birth name again, he would have killed the person who dared to utter such words.  Therein lay his dilemma.  He'd killed for less, ordered villages to be razed, the citizens slaughtered.  How could he be given absolution?  How did he deserve it?  Especially from someone like Rey, who signified everything that was good in the universe?  He felt tainted next to her, but he couldn't turn away from her.  He'd tried.  He stumbled to a halt when she suddenly whirled to face him, her hands rising to grip his shoulders, her expression fierce.  It was then he realized he must have inadvertently communicated his insecurities to her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You <em> do </em>deserve to be forgiven, Ben.  You were manipulated, your thoughts and feelings twisted.  Yes, those choices were yours to make, but you had help in making them.  What matters is that you regret them.  That's what makes you Ben Solo, what makes you worthy.  You have redeemed yourself.  You aren't tainted, Ben.  Not anymore.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey?”  A voice sounding like Poe called from just outside the vessel.  “Are you in there?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Briefly, Rey's hands cupped his face, her thumbs caressing his cheekbones before she turned away, the moment broken.  Ben would have given nearly anything to have it back.  Twice now, she had kissed him and had looked as if she would have done so again had they not been interrupted.  He swore, when they were alone, <em> he'd </em> be the one to kiss <em> her </em>.  Silently, he watched her descend the ramp.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Poe!  Finn!</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her elation slammed into him, knocking him against the nearest bulkhead, automatically opening their link, and he saw blurry snippets of joyous workers scurrying about, hugging each other in happy relief.  Well, that was new.  He'd never been able to see her surroundings before.  Their connection was obviously strengthening.  It would be interesting to see how far it would go.  Would they be able to physically cross space to join the other, no matter the distance?  Before he could think on it further, her surroundings faded into the shadowed interior of his ship.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We're fine, Poe!  I swear!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“We?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>If there ever was a cue for his entrance onto the scene, that was it.  Taking a moment to center himself, he slowly walked down the ramp … and faced every blaster within range pointed directly at his chest.  With the quick reflexes he'd always admired in her, Rey had her lightsaber activated, standing in front of him, ready to deflect any attack.  He didn't dare reach for his own.  Tensions were high enough.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Wait!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey!  What are you doing?  Why didn't you kill him when you had the chance?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Poe, shut up and listen!  All of you, please, put down your weapons and listen!  Kylo Ren no longer exists!  <em> Ben Solo does! </em>”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The one who called himself Finn called out, “You expect us to believe that?  After everything he's done?  He's tried to kill you!  More than once!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“But he couldn't, Finn.  Not because he wasn’t strong enough, but because he couldn’t bring himself to do it.  He even saved my life on Exegol.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben glanced quickly down at Rey.  She hid it well, but he could sense in her a feeling of discomfort at the mention of the Sith Lord, not that he could blame her.  He didn't exactly want to think about him either or what they experienced.  The soul-rending pain when she had died would haunt his dreams for years to come, he was sure.  Looking around, he saw nothing but distrust, felt anger and unease at his presence.  In front of him, Rey tensed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“If you'll notice, Ben hasn't bothered to draw his own weapon.  Says something, don't you think?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The gathered crowd suddenly began to part and Ben spotted the bulbous head and eyes of Admiral Ackbar.  “Put away your weapons.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seeing the Admiral did not fill Ben with much assurance.  He'd seen the Mon Calamari often during his younger years, but those years were filled with resentment over his mother's incessant political duties.  The thought of his mother brought a wave of unexpected pain.  He had felt her death as well.  In fact, he was almost certain he had heard her call his name just before a surge in the Force sent him hurtling back to Rey.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben Solo.  It has been a long time.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben merely ducked his head in acknowledgment.  “Admiral Ackbar.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ackbar advanced on Rey, laid a hand on her arm, and gently pressed downward, lowering her lightsaber.  Then, he turned to face the others.  “Lower your weapons.  There has been enough fighting for today.  Tonight, we shall celebrate the victories that we have all,” here Ackbar faced Ben, “fought so hard for.”  His huge, orange eyes rotated between Ben and Rey as he pulled out a datapad.  “Ben, this will lead you to your quarters.  Eat.  Shower.  Get some rest.  We shall talk later.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>BR</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> He ran.  He ran and fought off every foe he came across but couldn't reach her.  Every way he ran led straight back to the point of entrance, more enemies attacking at each turn.  Rey's desperation and pain bled through the Force urging him into more furiously frantic actions.  Then, suddenly, he and Rey were in Palpatine's clutches, his life being leeched away to increase the Sith Lord's power.  Vaguely aware of what was happening, he felt himself being flung away like a used rag.  His head bounced off stone as he landed with a thud, not having enough energy to even try to control his fall. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Pain.  Excruciating pain convulsed his entire body.  He could no longer feel Rey!  She was gone!  Weakly, he stretched out an arm as if to reach her.  “No!  Rey!” </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> He'd failed her, had taken too long and she had paid the price.  No, it couldn't be.  She couldn't be gone.  Pulling himself to his feet, he made his hands grab onto the wall of the chasm he'd fallen into, forced his feet to find purchase, and with an iron will, climbed.  He reached the edge and was over it, the most heart-wrenching sight meeting his eyes.  His worst nightmare.  Rey lying lifeless before him.  Stumbling forward, he took her body into his arms.  The flashes in the atmosphere reflected in her glassy eyes.  For a moment, he cradled her close.  Letting her rest in his lap, he placed his hand on her and focused.  Finding the Force inside him, he tried to do for her what she had once done for him – but it wouldn't work!  No matter how hard he tried, he failed. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> “No!' </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben startled awake, gasping for breath, heart racing.  Reaching up, he wiped the sweat from his brow and rubbed his eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Bolting upright, he found Rey standing at the foot of his bed.  Without hesitation, he reached for her, unbelievably thankful they could touch through their bond.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I felt your distress.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Inhaling deeply, Ben ran a hand over his face.  “A nightmare.  Nothing more.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben, you don't have to hide from me.  Talk to me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Unable to pull his eyes from hers, Ben lifted a hand to her cheek.  Did he dare give voice to what he wished?  In the past, he had simply taken what it was he wanted.  No hesitancy.  This … uncertainty … confused him.  What was the right move to make?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Of their own accord, the words fell from his lips.  “I wish you were here.  Truly here.”  Embarrassed for having let that slip, he backed away.  “I'm fine, Rey.  Enjoy your rest.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey's presence in his temporary quarters faded to nothing, leaving Ben with an empty void inside.  Knowing he would be getting no more sleep, he decided he needed a distraction and some training would be the way to do it.  Dressed in a simple tunic and pants, a thin belt around his waist – all black, of course – Ben donned his boots and clipped Luke's lightsaber to his belt.  Stepping outside, he headed in the exact opposite direction he knew Rey to be.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Finding a clearing in the jungle-like flora far enough away from the encampment to avoid the casual passerby, Ben closed his eyes to help center himself by reaching out with the Force to 'read' his surroundings.  Allowing the Force to guide him rather than his eyes, he began some strenuous Jedi exercises that involved leaping, twisting in mid-air, lightsaber practice dodging and weaving around imaginary opponents while deflecting attacks, and manipulating specific objects around him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Time slipped by and, eventually, Ben took a break.  Glancing down at the weapon in his hand, he, for the first time in a long time, allowed himself to truly think about his uncle.  He had revered the man for his accomplishments and his wisdom.  The man's betrayal cut deeply.  The one thing Ben had forgotten was that his uncle, despite being a Jedi Master, was still just a man, a man just as capable of making terrible mistakes.  While Ben wasn't certain he'd ever truly forgive his uncle, he actually had hope that he might finally be able to put it to rest – in time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>An increase in the Force told Ben his connection to Rey had activated again.  She stood a few feet away.  Not sure whether to be amused or irritated, Ben walked over to where her spiritual projection stood.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Again?  I'm beginning to think you like me or something.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>She gifted him with a brief smile.  “Or something.  <em> You </em> called to <em> me.  </em>I could feel your conflict.  What were you thinking about?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Luke.”  He shrugged.  “Everything.  Trying to let go of the past.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“He loved you, you know.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I know.  I think.  I've just come to some conclusions that I need to contemplate further.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Then, I'll let you get back to it.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Just as quickly as she had come, she was gone.  The hairs at his neck tingled and Ben looked up to find both Poe and Finn watching him, neither looking very happy.  They probably thought Rey was close by.  Either that or thought he was unstable.  Most likely the latter.  Being Ben Solo was confusing.  He wasn't sure <em> how </em>to be Ben Solo.  Where did Ben end and Kylo Ren begin?  How far could he take Ben Solo before Kylo Ren took over again?  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Tired of the questions that ran around in his head, he prepared to return to his exercises.  At least those made him focus, clearing his mind for a while.  A fleeting thought entered his head, remarkably in Rey's amused voice.  <em> You've been Ben Solo longer than you think.  You'll figure it out. </em>   Ben's head snapped up, his eyes searching, but Rey was nowhere to be found.  Had she just managed to project her thoughts to him?  Or had it been a figment of imagination, a trick of his own mind?  Facing the direction he knew her quarters to be in, he made the attempt to respond <em> without </em>opening their connection again, though he seemed to have no control over that, either.  He heard nothing in return.  More than a little frustrated, Ben took note of his lingering audience, squared his shoulders, and immersed himself in his exercises again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>BR</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When Rey awakened, her first thought was of Ben.  The need to see him, to simply be in his proximity surged through her, lending her plenty of energy.  Grabbing her lightsaber, she took off in search of him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Normally, she would have been happy to see Poe and Finn, but at that moment, all she felt was irritation.  Nevertheless, she pasted a smile on her face and turned in their direction.  “Hi!  How are you doing?  Everything alright?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Poe crossed his arms over his chest and scowled down at her.  “No, it isn't.  How could you bring him back here?  After everything he's done, how can you just ignore it all?  No one changes overnight, and people like <em> him </em>don't change at all!  Whatever it is he's told you to get you to bring him to us, it's a lie.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Finn added, “Or, maybe, he'd done one of those mind tricks on you.  Either way, he doesn't belong here.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her friends' lack of faith in her, well, hurt.  No <em> Hey, how are you?  </em> No <em> Are you okay?  </em> Not even a <em> Rey, we did it! </em>  No, the first things out of their mouths were accusations against Ben!  Judging by their postures, neither was open to any explanations, either.  More than a little angry with them, she grabbed each by the arm and marched them out of the encampment to a more private spot to have their conversation.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Reaching a spot that would do, she spun them to face her and spat out, “First of all, hi, it's nice to see you again.  Yeah, I'm fine, thanks.  And second, did you not hear Admiral Ackbar welcome Ben back?  If <em> he </em>accepts Ben, why can't you?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Poe paced a few steps before turning back to face her, expression dark.  “Because he's <em> not </em>Ben Solo.  He killed Ben a long time ago.  You can't just stop being someone in an instant.  He's Kylo Ren and the sooner you realize that the better off you'll be.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Are you listening to yourself?  In one breath you say he killed Ben and, in the next, said he can't stop being someone!  You're right on your last point.  He may have taken on the identity of Kylo Ren, but he never stopped being Ben Solo.  I could feel the good in him from the first moment we met.  Over the last year, Ben Solo began emerging more and more.  It hasn't been as sudden as you think it has.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Finn gently took her by her shoulders as if bracing her to hear some bad news.  “Rey, the man is unbalanced.  We saw him earlier and he was talking to himself.  Not just muttering but a real conversation.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey laughed.  She couldn't help it.  Poe and Finn had witnessed her and Ben's Force connection!  Their expressions as she laughed made her laugh harder.  They probably thought she had already lost her mind.  Did she dare explain?  Would knowing she and Ben formed a Force dyad help or hinder?  If their reaction to just Ben's presence was any indicator, knowing of the link probably would make things worse, but how long could she and Ben keep it secret?  At the moment, they had no real control over it.  There was a very good chance others would bear witness to it happening.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Reining in her laughter, Rey looked up at the two of them.  “I was there.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No.  You weren't.  He was talking to thin air.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Trust me, Finn.  I was there.  In fact, trust me about Ben.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Poe shook his head.  “I don't think I can.  I think he's already begun to corrupt you.  I'm keeping my eye on him, and when I have proof that <em> Kylo Ren </em> still exists, I'll force you to see it.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Seeing she wouldn't change either of their minds right then, Rey simply whirled away from them and stalked off, annoyed when they followed her.  “I don't need an escort!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“If you're going to see Ren, then yes, you do.  I'm not leaving you alone with him.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> “It's Ben!  </em>Don't you dare call him anything else, not to his face and not in my presence!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ignoring the two idiots, Rey reached out into the Force and easily located Ben.  Mere minutes later, she found the clearing he was training in and simply watched him.  He moved so impossibly gracefully for someone his size.  He was beautiful to watch.  The clothes he wore did nothing to hide the muscles he had developed over the years, bunching and flexing through the movements.  His fluidity, his skill, and yes, that physique, all combined to make a very attractive package.  Aware the two idiots were with her, she tried to hide the heat rising to her cheeks and the way her pulse seemed to have picked up as she watched him.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>To her surprise, Ben appeared to stumble, four stones he'd been keeping airborne dropped to the ground with heavy thuds.  The instant his gaze met hers no one and nothing else existed.  Oh, how she wanted to kiss him again!  Like a moth to his flame, Rey drew closer to him, only to be suddenly yanked back.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Rey!  What are you doing?  Snap out of it!”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I knew he had used some kind of mind trick on you!” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey shrugged off Poe's hands.  “Stop!  Just stop!”  She backed toward Ben, stopping only when about a foot separated them.  “You're acting like idiots!  Both of you!  I had no idea you were so close-minded, and I can't believe, Finn, that you, of all people, are acting like this.  When we learned you had been a stormtrooper, did we ostracize you?  No, we took you in, considered you a friend.  All I'm asking is that you do the same for Ben.  I'm hurt, angry, and disappointed that you won't.  Know this.  If you make me choose, it won't be you.”  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Turning her back on the other two, Rey met Ben's dark eyes again.  “Train with me?”  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The smile he gave her did funny things to her insides.  Yes, he definitely needed to smile more.  His left hand lifted to caress her cheek, a gesture he’d done a lot, a whisper of a touch.  “Of course.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Two innocuous words, but said so softly in that silky voice, they sounded exceedingly provocative, setting off delicious little shivers inside her.  Ben didn't have to use Jedi mind tricks on her.  He just needed to speak exactly like that.  His lips curled into a half-smile, which prompted Rey to amend her thought.  <em> Smile at her </em>and use that voice and she would do anything he asked.  She couldn't help but respond with a smile of her own before taking a step back and igniting her lightsaber.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He stepped back, gave her a little shrug that clearly said <em> Let's go </em>, then suddenly burst into action.  It didn't take long before she had to jump, dodge, and block landscape elements as well.  Twice, he managed to send her lightsaber flying and she had to resort to limbs and rocks for defense until she could even think about recalling it.  Any time she failed to block in time, he displayed amazing control by stopping just shy of making contact.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Their practice session turned more … personal … when his parry brought them chest to chest, lips so close their breaths mingled.  For a full minute, Rey froze, too caught up in the heated look in Ben's eyes and her response to seeing that look.  Without any warning, their connection opened and Rey could have sworn she could actually <em> hear </em>his thoughts in her head!  Thoughts that had her blushing furiously but bringing a smile to her face all the same!  For a brief second, her gaze dipped to his full lips, the urge to kiss him springing to life.  Especially when said lips stretched into another gorgeous smile.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Her instincts suddenly screamed to spin out of the way and Rey followed them, narrowly avoiding being hit by an oncoming branch.  Once more at a safe distance, she followed his every move with narrowed eyes.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> You want to play it that way, do you? </em>she automatically thought, wondering if he'd pick it up.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His cocky shrug said loud and clear that he'd heard her.  <em> Expect the unexpected.  Don't let yourself be distracted. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey paced in a circle around him, giving herself time to get herself together, and glared in Ben's direction.  <em> That's easy for you to say. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> No, it really isn't.   </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Okay, that hadn't been the response she'd expected from him.  Trying not to think about it, she went on the offensive.  Several times, they ended up in close contact, and when she contemplated it later, she would realize it had happened on purpose.  One might call it flirtation – or even a form of foreplay.  All she knew was that she enjoyed the tingling sensations that swamped her when those moments occurred.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Growing weary, Rey stumbled – right into Ben's attack, taking a shot to her upper arm.  In an instant, his blade disappeared.  Concern radiated from his entire body as he placed a hand over the wound and healed it.  He continued to watch her, guilt slowly clouding his features, almost to the point of breaking her heart.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ben – ”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I'm sorry, Rey.  I never meant to hurt you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey indicated the now-unblemished area of skin beneath the tear in her sleeve.  “It was an accident.  They're going to happen from time to time.  It's fine now, so don't worry.  Besides, you barely grazed me.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> That was more than a simple graze. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey put away her own weapon, threaded her fingers together at the base of Ben's neck, and pulled his forehead to hers.  <em> I'm no delicate flower who needs special handling.  What I do need is for you to help me hone my skills.  I can't do that if you're too afraid of me. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Afraid of you?  Exactly which of us was disarmed during that duel and how many times did it happen? </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey grinned at the slight cockiness of his response, glad she'd been able to derail his descent into a more depressive mood.  <em> I did say I needed your help. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben let out a little laugh, his arms wrapping around her.  <em> So you did.  I guess it's safe to say our connection is intensifying.  We haven't actually spoken a word in several minutes.  I don't understand it, but I'm grateful for it. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> I am, too.  I'm actually surprised it's stayed open so long.  It's never done that before. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> No, it hasn't.  Perhaps we should –  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Silence.  Well, so much for that.  Rey let out a little huff of irritation.  “Back to regular speech for now.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Right.  It would be useful to learn to control it.  That's what I was saying when it closed.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes, it would.  From my own personal observations, it seems to open when one of us is experiencing strong emotions.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“True.”  He gave her another crooked smile.  “You always did bring out strong emotions in me.  Irritation.  Frustration.  Intrigue.  Confusion.”  His smile melted away as quickly as it appeared.  “Longing.  All of them were more intense when associated with you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey opened her mouth but no words came out.  What could she say to that?  In a roundabout way, it was one of the most beautiful things ever said to her.  She didn't get a chance to respond.  An excited, animalistic howl roared not far from them and then a pair of strong Wookie arms engulfed them, squeezing tightly.  Rapid-fire chuffs poured from the Wookie's mouth, obviously scolding them.  Just when she thought she'd have to take drastic measures in order to breathe again, Chewie let them go.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey beamed up at the towering Wookie.  “Hey, Chewie.  It's okay.  I'm not surprised the Falcon needed attention.  We were fairly tired anyway.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Chewie studied Ben a moment, spouted another litany of annoyed, then happy, noises, lifted a giant, furry hand, and playfully mussed Ben's hair.  Rey had been a little worried about how Chewie would take Ben's return after what happened with Han.  Apparently, like her, Chewie believed Ben regretted the things he had done.  That, Rey knew, would go a long way in healing Ben.  His laughter warmed her heart.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I know, I know, Chewie!  It won't happen again!  I promise!  Next time, I’ll come to see you immediately.”  A moment or two passed before he softly admitted, “I truly am sorry, Chewie.  If I could go back … ”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Chewie nodded, chuffed something Rey couldn't quite catch – but thought it was something similar to <em> I can see that, headstrong youngling.  I forgive you – </em> patted Ben on the head, then went to continue working on the Falcon.  Ben sat on a nearby boulder.  Sensing his pensive mood, Rey wasn't sure if she should let him be or join him, so she remained where she stood.  She received her answer when he met her gaze and held out his hand to her.  Without a moment's hesitation, she stepped forward and took it, allowing him to draw her to his side.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He let out a little laugh.  “I told you once that you'd be by my side.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey bumped his shoulder as she sat beside him.  “And I told <em> you </em> that I would take <em> Ben's </em>hand.”  When he said nothing more, she draped an arm across his broad shoulders and pulled him close to her.  “Seeing Chewie was difficult for you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It was.  For some stupid reason, it never occurred to me that I would be seeing him, too.  Loyalty and trust are sacrosanct to Wookies.  I broke both of them.  I don't know how he can just forgive me as if I was nothing more than a disobedient child.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Because you found your way back to who you once were.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben gestured in the direction Chewie had gone.  “How does <em> he </em>know that?  How can he be so sure?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Taking his hands, Rey stared directly into his eyes.  “Because <em> I </em> know that and, unlike some others, he trusts my judgment.  And no, I don't want to hear an <em> I told you so </em>.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I wouldn't say that.”  The small curl of a corner to his lips put lie to his words.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Admit it.  You've been d – wanting to say that since we landed.”  Inwardly, Rey cringed.  She still couldn't say that word or any meaningless phrase that contained it or pertained to it.  She couldn't be sure she ever would again consider them meaningless.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You can say it, Rey.  It's just a word.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey vigorously shook her head, her vision swimming as tears filled her eyes.  “I can't.  Not yet.  I nearly lost you, Ben.  That word and all its little phrases aren't meaningless anymore.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I know.  I <em> had </em>lost you.  But what are you going to do?  Strike the word from your vocabulary?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No.  It's just too fresh right now, too real.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben slipped her arm from his shoulders and used it to pull her against his chest, her forehead resting against his cheek.  One hand dug into her braided hair at the back of her head.  His other arm spanned her waist.  It was an awkward position considering the small space and how they had to twist around to achieve it, but Rey didn't care.  Any time she could be in a position where her physical senses could confirm that Ben was there with her, she'd take it without complaint.  A tender kiss pressed to her forehead was her undoing.  Arms wrapping around his chest, her fingers dug in, clutching him tightly as the tears came again.  This time, however, they didn't last long.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> I'm so pathetic.  I'm usually not like this.  You probably think I'm weak. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Never, Rey.  You're the strongest person I know.  You've had to be.  If tears help, shed them.  I'd rather be here to hold you through your moment of distress than have you hide them and deal with it alone.  Although, with our bond, you probably wouldn't be alone.  I'd still rather be here physically. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> You seem less bothered by it all. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Believe me, Rey, when I say that I'm not.  My nightmare earlier?  I couldn't reach you.  Every way I turned took me right back to the beginning.  By the time I did get to you, I couldn’t protect you.  I felt your death.  I tried to bring you back but I couldn’t.  No matter how hard I tried, nothing worked.  I'm half-afraid to sleep for fear of reliving that. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hearing that brought a fresh wave of tears for the wounded man she loved.  <em> I'm sorry, Ben.  We're here, though.  Together.  That's probably what we need to focus on. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> And the link, seeing as it activated again without either of us realizing.  At least, I hadn't and I normally do. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> I normally do, too, but hadn't noticed anything signifying it had this time.  Talking to you like this almost feels more natural.  You do realize that we're not going to be able to keep this a secret.  The two idiots have already witnessed it.  </em> Rey chuckled at the memory.  <em> They thought you were talking to yourself. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> What did you tell them? </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey shrugged.  <em> Just that I was there with you.  Of course, they didn't believe me.  They probably thought I'd completely lost my mind.  </em>She took a moment to nuzzle his neck, lightly kissing the underside of his jaw.  </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Ah, that explains why they were following you. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Was it her imagination or did he sound just a bit breathless?  If a mental voice <em> had </em> a sound, that was.  <em> Yeah.  In their infinite wisdom, they thought I needed an escort.  At least they're gone now. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben let out a snort of laughter.  <em> Yeah, I'm sure they'd be less than pleased to see you like this with me. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>As his fingers slipped from her hair, his thumb traced the curve of her ear, then trailed along her jaw and came to rest near the pulse point in her neck.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> It would have been their fault.  I told them I didn't need an escort. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The feel of Ben's lips skimming kisses along the path his thumb had taken completely blanked Rey's mind as to what they were discussing.  She did have the presence of mind to tilt her head to the side so he could reach her neck better.  Unfortunately, the delicious moment didn’t last.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A jubilant shout echoed across the camp, shattering their blissful moment.  The sounds of many feet and ecstatic voices grew steadily louder as they approached the clearing’s side of camp.  Rey sighed, looking in that direction.  It must be time for dinner.  Then would come the celebrations and whatever entertainment that accompanied them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Standing and dusting herself off, she held out her hand.  “Come on.  I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The discordant noise inside the makeshift cafeteria suddenly dropped to a buzz when Rey and Ben entered.  He tensed beside her at the accusing glares, the uncertain expressions, but she wasn’t going to let them run Ben out.  In plain view of all who were there, she took his hand, threading their fingers together and, ignoring everyone watching, pulled him along to the buffet tables.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t need to be shielded, Rey.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t know.  If looks could kill, you’d …  Well, let’s just say, I’m glad we’re the only ones with abilities even remotely close to that.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Once their plates were full, Rey led him to an empty end of one of the tables.  To her everlasting consternation, a few people changed tables, but most of those already seated stayed put.  She and Ben did not remain alone, however.  Admiral Ackbar joined them, as did Chewie and Finn’s girlfriend - Rey’s only female friend - Rose sat with them.  Though there was conversation, it was slightly stilted, but Rey thanked the stars that they tried anyway.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After glancing around the room, Ben sarcastically observed, “They look as if they’re expecting me to do something.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey scanned the people watching them.  “Well, they probably are expecting that.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I should give them what they want, then.  Do you think if I jumped up and yelled <em> Boo </em> at them, it would make them all more comfortable?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey snorted at the visual.  Unfortunately, she had just taken a drink and ended up inhaling it.  Once her airway was clear enough to breathe properly, she joined the others in laughter at the mental image.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Through her laughter, she cried, “Ben!  That was terrible!”  His unconcerned shrug and rogue-ish grin set her off again, drawing many disapproving looks from those nearby.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It was just a thought.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Once Admiral Ackbar regained some self-control, he told her, “He comes by it naturally.  I recall a certain former smuggler who had suggested something similar when no one seemed to give him a chance.  Only thing is, he actually followed through.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey instantly sobered.  Peeking up at Ben to see how he was taking hearing about his father, she was relieved to see he didn’t appear too upset.  The admiral continued with his tale, citing how furious Leia had been when Han had actually run around the cafeteria, screaming at the top of his lungs like a madman, then suddenly sat in his chair and calmly finished his meal.  Thinking to lend him a little support, Rey propped her elbow on the back of Ben’s chair and lightly caressed his back.  The muscles beneath her hand loosened bit by bit.  The Mon Calamari must have noticed Ben’s tension since he didn’t mention either Han or Leia again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Not long after, the meal was over and everyone gathered for the actual victory celebration to begin.  It didn’t surprise Rey in the least when Ben insisted on standing at the very back, in the shadows, so she stood with him, slipping an arm around his waist.  In turn, he pulled her into his chest.  As fireworks burst in the sky and others chatted, danced, or enjoyed the music, Rey and Ben remained in their own little world, delighting in the feel of being close to the other without having to hide the depth of their feelings.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The first kiss shared that evening was a simple meeting of lips, as was the second one.  The third one, however, left Rey completely breathless and weak in the knees, the desire it invoked intoxicating.  The instant she could breathe, she eagerly went back for more.  Again and again.  Heaven resided in the taste of Ben’s lips, in the touch of his hands, the smell of his skin.  <em> This </em> was where she belonged.  <em> This </em>was her home.  No one could tell her otherwise.  Even as she craved more, she eventually had to stop.  Her heart beat so hard it made breathing practically nonexistent.  She felt so weak she couldn’t be sure her knees would support her much longer.  Tucking in against his neck, Rey grinned smugly at the pulse that matched her own.  It was good to know it hadn’t just been her experiencing such exquisite sensations.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Definitely not just you, Rey.  I told you.  Every emotion I ever felt, when associated with you, I felt much more intensely. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> I know what you told me.  </em> Rey’s hand slid from his back to his chest, over his racing heart.  <em> It’s just nice to have proof. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> I could easily give you all the proof you need. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Now, Rey may have been innocent in some ways, she wasn’t so clueless as to not understand the suggestive nature of Ben’s statement.  It both embarrassed her and intrigued her.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Rey, I didn’t mean --  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Picking up on Ben’s embarrassment, Rey chuckled.  <em> It’s fine.  Don’t worry about it.  </em> She paused a moment before shyly asking, <em> Do I really --  </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Do I have to state, again, the level to which I feel things about you? </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hearing the laughter in his voice, Rey smiled.  <em> No, I think three times was plenty.  </em> As they remained in place against the tree, Rey became aware of the thinning crowd.  <em> It must be late if most everyone has gone to bed already.  We missed the entire celebration. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Complaining? </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em> Of course not.  I’ve wanted to kiss you like that all day!  </em> Weariness suddenly filled her.  <em> I need sleep.  You do, too. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> I’m not sure I want to. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> I know.  I’ll be there if you need me. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> I know you will.  Come on.  I can feel how tired you are.  I’ll walk you back. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>At her door, Rey found it difficult to say goodnight.  From the time she’d awakened from her nap, they’d been together.  She really didn’t want it to end.  Too, she was a little concerned for Ben.  His nightmare during such a brief period of sleep had been bad enough.  What would the night likely bring?  She feared whatever it was would be horrifying.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Don’t worry about me, Rey.  Go to bed.  Meet me at sunrise at our clearing? </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Alright.  Goodnight, Ben. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Sleep well, Rey. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Not likely when you’re on the opposite side of camp. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>As Rey had hoped, Ben grinned down at her.  <em> Not the best thing to say to me right now. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> Oh, I don’t know.  You’re thinking about something else now, aren’t you? </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Laughing softly, he nodded.  <em> That is very true.  Goodnight, Rey. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>Rey watched him leave until he had blended into the shadows.  With any luck, Ben wouldn’t be bothered tonight, either by dreams or by the physical world.  She didn’t want to believe anyone of the Resistance would sink low enough to try to attack Ben in his sleep, but she also knew exactly what most people thought of him.  Slightly tapping into the Force, she made certain he at least made it back to his room safely before leaving him be.</p>
<p>
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  <br/>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. The Right to Grow</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ben has nightmares and can't sleep, prompting Rey to take action and refuses to back down from.  The governing body isn't happy with Kylo Ren being free.  Poe is still a hotheaded idiot.  A quest takes our beloved characters off-planet.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>No person is your friend who demands your silence, or denies your right to grow.</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>-- Alice Walker</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>
      <br/>
      <br/>
    </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben jerked awake, gasping Rey’s name in anguish.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Talk to me, Ben.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Not surprisingly, the bond had activated again, pulling Rey into his room.  For a moment, he simply lay where he was, wiping the sweat from his brow with a trembling hand.  The speed of his pulse could have rivaled his fighter at that moment, breathing next to impossible, let alone actually speaking.  Eventually, he calmed enough to get the words out.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I turned you.  You actually took my hand the first time I offered it.”  Though his eyes filled with tears, he refused to let them fall.  His voice cracked with his emotions, however.  “I took everything that was good in you and twisted it into something ugly. ”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m so sorry, Ben.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Taking in a lungful of air, he shrugged.  “Don’t be, Rey.  It was a dream.  Nothing more.”  Glancing out the window, he saw it wasn’t quite as dark as it had been.  “It’s still early.  Go back to sleep.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why should I when you’re not?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Who said I wasn’t?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey’s brows rose in obvious disbelief.  “Are you?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sighing, Ben drug himself to a sitting position, leaning against the wall, weary from lack of quality sleep.  He wouldn’t be getting back to sleep now, either.  He knew it and </span>
  <em>
    <span>she </span>
  </em>
  <span>knew it, so it was pointless to lie to her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Probably not, no.  I’ll just, I don’t know, meditate for a while or take a walk.  That should help clear my head.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“In the meantime, you miss out on the rest you need.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Again, Ben shrugged.  Missing sleep wasn’t something he was unaccustomed to.  “I’ve functioned fine with less.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You probably have.  That doesn’t make it healthy.  I’m just worried about you, Ben.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know, Rey, but I’m fine.  I promise.  Now go back to sleep.  If you want to train with me again, you’re going to need to be in top form.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Just don’t push yourself too hard, okay?  Not until you’ve gotten sufficient rest.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben leaned forward, bringing his hand up to caress her cheek, taking comfort in the softness of her skin, and offered her an assuring smile.  “Sleep, Rey.  I’m fine now.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The Force must have agreed with him as it sent her away.  Propping his elbows on his knees, Ben dropped his head into his hands, his fingers curling into his hair.  He’d always had nightmares.  For as long as he could remember, his dreams consisted of darkness.  Not always complete darkness, but much of the time, there had been dark elements in them.  The past year alone, as Kylo Ren faded and Ben Solo emerged, his dreams had been filled with the terrible, unforgivable things he’d done.  He handled his dreams then, he could do so now.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sitting cross-legged on the bed, Ben relaxed as best he could, and closing his eyes, tapped into the Force to lend him some serenity.  That wasn’t what he received.  In his mind’s eye, he saw himself becoming Kylo Ren again, associating with the Knights of Ren.  He saw Rey, staring down the business end of a lightsaber.  Saw her bruised and battered as if she had just fought a fierce battle and lost.  Fear and desperation permeated the visions.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He snapped back to awareness of his surroundings and sighed in relief.  Rey hadn’t sensed anything.  The last thing he wanted was to talk about what he’d seen.  What </span>
  <em>
    <span>had </span>
  </em>
  <span>he seen?  The future?  A manifestation of his fears?  Sadly, he had no answers.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I don’t have them, either.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben whirled to face the voice of his uncle.  The sight of him again filled him with warring emotions.  Anger.  Disappointment.  Longing.  Sadness.  “What are you doing here?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re especially troubled.  I thought I’d try to help, even if there isn’t much I can tell you.  Ben, I truly am sorry for everything.  If you hadn’t caught me in a moment of weakness, things may have turned out completely different.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Giving the past some thought, he slowly shook his head.  “I don’t know that they would have been.  By then, he already had filled me with darkness.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I promise you, if I had known about Rey, I would have searched her out, would have brought her to you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Again, Ben shook his head.  He’d given the subject of Rey a lot of thought and had come to the only possible conclusion.  “The Force kept us apart until recently for a reason, one we haven’t figured out yet.  I doubt you would have succeeded in finding her.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Maybe not, but I would have tried.”  The spirit of Luke shook his head with a laugh.  “A Dyad connection.  Only Han’s kid.  He never did anything halfway, either.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben leaned back against the wall once more.  Luke had studied the old Jedi scrolls and books.  If anyone had any inkling of what it all meant, it would be him.  “Do you know anything about this bond Rey and I have?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Not much was written about it, I’m afraid.  It was a rare thing, even then.  More theoretical than anything.  I’m sorry that I don’t know more than that.  As for your visions, it’s hard to say what they mean.  It could be a possible future.  Without a context, it’s impossible to know.  The future is fluid, ever-changing.  I have one piece of advice.  Don’t keep what you have seen from Rey.  You are not alone, Ben.  Lean on her.  Let her help you.  She’s your equal in every way.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>With that sage advice imparted, Luke’s ghost faded out, leaving Ben to ponder what had been said.  Luke’s choice of words was curious.  Not much had been written but he didn’t say what </span>
  <em>
    <span>had </span>
  </em>
  <span>been.  Maybe it was something he couldn’t say.  Who knew?  All </span>
  <em>
    <span>he </span>
  </em>
  <span>knew was that he was tired of all the questions.  Or, maybe he was just tired.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Deciding to do something productive, Ben dressed, then stepped into the cool, very early morning.  The scent of damp earth, the slight breeze, and the calling winged creatures all helped to soothe him as he made his way to the clearing he had chosen as his training ground.  He’d always loved this time of the morning, when others slept, leaving just the sounds, scents, and sights of nature to fill his senses.  There was a peaceful quality about it that could be found at no other time.  Not even meditation could bring about this kind of peace.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Stepping into the clearing, the memory of training with Rey the day before came to mind.  Dueling with her had been … exciting.  Each time they had come together, it had taken all his self-control to refrain from kissing her, especially once he had discovered she had wanted the same.  She’d looked so incredibly sexy.  Highly distracting and </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>conducive to proper training, but at the moment, nothing could be done about it.  As Rey had suggested, it seemed heightened emotions did, indeed, initiate the link between them.  Until they learned to control it, they would likely be bombarded with random thoughts or feelings and should learn to work around them.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Perhaps that was where they should begin that morning.  Trotting out into the foliage, Ben set up an obstacle course of activities and objects for Rey to perform, retrieve, or manipulate while he stayed in the clearing and attempted to open their connection and distract her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>By the time Rey set out on the course he had devised, Ben had already been up for hours.  His mind kept wandering away from his self-appointed task.  Taking a deep breath, he rubbed his eyes.  His fatigue was getting the better of him.  He’d even argued with Rey over the training.  She’d taken one look at him and had refused.  His temper a bit short, he’d goaded her into it.  Now, he was on edge and couldn’t seem to focus.  Nothing was working anyway.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Thinking a deeper meditation might work - if he could focus well enough - Ben closed his eyes, deepened his breathing.  Slowly in.  Slowly out.  He concentrated on everything and nothing at all, seeking to, essentially, </span>
  <em>
    <span>be </span>
  </em>
  <span>the Force.  He didn’t often do this as it left one vulnerable, the senses no longer sending messages to the mind.  Yes, the Force could heighten one’s senses; therefore, making the Jedi more aware of his surroundings.  What Ben was attempting to do went deeper than that.  What he hoped to accomplish essentially shut the mind to every outside influence except the most primal of instincts.  It also presented another danger in the form of the Dark side.  By becoming the Force as Ben was attempting, it meant he’d become a part of the Dark side as well.  All of that aside, it could be mentally taxing.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He didn’t know how long it took, but he began to see flickers of movement, to hear grunts, gasps and hisses of effort.  Homing in on those little noises helped.  Suddenly, there she was, using a vine to climb a rock face to reach the piece of metal he’d found lying on the ground.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>There you are.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey let out a startled squeak, losing her concentration and sliding down to the ground.  She spun around and found him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Ben?  You actually did it?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m here, aren’t I?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>For a moment, Rey disappeared.  Concentrating harder brought her back.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>How did you do it?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Questions later.  Train now.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Fine.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>While Rey progressed, Ben kept up a litany of random questions, some not even making any sense, to attempt to disrupt her focus.  Initially, she tried to answer him and he had to remind her she was supposed to be ignoring him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Well, that’s something I’ve never been able to do, now, isn’t it?  In case you haven’t noticed, you’re a hard person to ignore.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sterner than he had intended, Ben snapped, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Just focus, Rey!  </span>
  </em>
  <span>When she simply eyed him, he sighed.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>I’m sorry for snapping, okay?  I’m just - </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The connection abruptly shut and, with disorienting rapidity, he returned to himself in time to feel something at his back.  Startled, self-preservation kicked in.  Ben whirled and activated his lightsaber, all in one fluid motion, to face whatever was behind him, bringing it down to strike a killing blow on - Poe Dameron.  The instant it registered his enemy </span>
  <em>
    <span>wasn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>an enemy and stopped his attack, his blade was a scant few inches from cleaving the man in two, starting at his shoulder.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Gasping for breath, he couldn’t move for a few seconds.  Very carefully, he stepped back, letting his arm drop, and waited for Dameron to remove his hand from his blaster before deactivating his lightsaber.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Breathless, Ben warned the man.  “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Never </span>
  </em>
  <span>do that again.  I could have killed you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“We both know it wouldn’t be the first time you’d killed someone.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Ben?  I felt your emotions spike.  Fear?  Panic?  What’s wrong?  What happened?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>While he didn’t want to reveal his and Rey’s connection, Ben didn’t want to ignore her either.  He would have simply spoken mentally, but he was way beyond tired at the moment to attempt it.  He settled for verbal speech instead and let things fall where they may.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nothing’s wrong, Rey.  Just keep going.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, she </span>
  <em>
    <span>is </span>
  </em>
  <span>here with you.  Where is she?”  Poe’s gaze flew around the clearing.  “She’s not here.  Where is she?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Training.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Poe folded his arms over his chest.  “You’re the last person she should be training with, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ren.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Gritting his teeth to keep his temper in check, Ben managed, “I am the only person she </span>
  <em>
    <span>can </span>
  </em>
  <span>train with.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She’s done just fine on her own.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Ben, I’m coming back.  Just hang on.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No.  Rey, keep - ”  She was gone.  Ben let out a huge breath.  Well, at least there had been </span>
  <em>
    <span>some </span>
  </em>
  <span>kind of progress made.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why do you keep talking to her as if she’s here?  Is it a trick of some sort?  Are you trying to use one of your mind tricks on me?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>If </span>
  </em>
  <span>I were, you wouldn’t know it.  Really, there would be no </span>
  <em>
    <span>trying</span>
  </em>
  <span> to it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Apparently getting the insult Ben had thrown at him, Poe stepped up and jabbed Ben in the chest.  “Now, you listen here, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ren</span>
  </em>
  <span>.  I - “</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Poe!  Stop it!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Turning, Ben rushed over to a hobbling Rey.  “What happened?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Twisted my ankle on the way here.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I told you to keep going.  The whole point of the exercise was to learn to ignore outside distractions.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know what you told me, but what I felt was so quick and sharp I had to come see what caused it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben let out another sigh.  He’d been doing that a lot and it was only the morning.  “Never mind.  Come here.”  Lifting her, an arm at her back and under her knees, he carried her to the boulder they had sat on the day before.  “Take your boot off.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Kneeling with one knee raised, Ben propped her foot on his leg to look at the injured joint and winced.  “You shouldn’t have run on this.”  Very lightly, he touched the swollen area.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Rey - “</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Shut up, Poe.  Let Ben focus.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>To say that he was surprised she was willing to reveal this much was an understatement.  Nevertheless, he went ahead with his task, directing the Force to heal all of the damaged area.  In about a minute, the swelling disappeared. Rey let out a sound that Ben would have been embarrassed to admit quickened his pulse.  His eyes flew up to her face.  He had to know if she had done that on purpose.  No, she was busy checking her ankle’s mobility.  Wait, one corner of her lips quirked upwards into a teasing grin.  If she hadn’t done it on purpose, she knew how it affected him!  Somewhat awkwardly, Ben gained his feet.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Much better.  Thanks.  So, what was it I felt earlier?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I was startled.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Poe let out a disbelieving squawk.  “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You </span>
  </em>
  <span>were startled?!  What about </span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”  He turned to Rey.  “He nearly cut me in half!  I told you, Rey.  He’s dangerous!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I won’t make any apologies for defending myself from a perceived attack.  Having been in deep meditation and been abruptly flung out of it, I was disoriented and sensed a presence at my back.  I moved instinctively.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey waved a hand in Poe’s direction.  “There, you see?  Wait.”  She turned a questioning gaze onto Ben.  “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Deep </span>
  </em>
  <span>meditation?  So, you didn’t hear him approach?  Just how deep did you have to go?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A mild headache had begun to form in his temples.  Wearily, he rubbed at his forehead and let out a breath.  “Deeper than I really wanted to.  I know we need to figure out some control, but I don’t think that’s the way to do it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, I want some answers.  What are you two talking about, and why is it he keeps claiming to be talking to you when you’re nowhere to be found?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As if speaking to a very small child, Rey slowly said, “I told you.  I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am </span>
  </em>
  <span>there with him.  Ben can see me, but no one else can.”  She let out an irritated sound before turning her attention back to Ben.  “We should probably talk to Admiral Ackbar.  It would be good to have a high-ranking official know.  He can dispel any rumors that may develop.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Despite his misgivings about divulging something so personal, Ben could see the logic in what she said.  He wished it didn’t have to be right this minute.  It wouldn’t be too much longer before he’d be completely wiped out and crashing.  He’d much prefer to do that in his quarters, not out in the open for everyone to see.  It struck him as funny that, as Kylo Ren, he needed little sleep.  As Ben Solo, it seemed to be all he wanted.  Certainly, much of it had to do with the hatred he had harbored, fueling his anger, his body feeding off its energy.  Now that it was gone, there didn’t seem to be anything to sustain him.  His experiment didn’t help matters, either.  He remained silent on that, however.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re probably right.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>From the way she was eyeing him, Ben suspected he hadn’t kept a thing from her.  Her next words confirmed it, her expression tender.  “You look completely exhausted.  Not surprising, really, considering the dreams you’ve been having.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh?” Poe asked snidely.  “All of your past deeds coming back to haunt you?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey gasped.  “Poe!  How old are you?  Seven?”  She took Ben by the arm.  “Come on.  Let’s get this done so you can get some rest.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben let himself be led to the admiral’s quarters, having collected Chewie and, oddly, Rose.  He wasn’t sure how to feel about seeing the Mon Calamari for the second time in as many days.  He didn’t have long to ponder it, for Rey had them inside rather quickly.  Once they were all seated, Ben motioned for her to start the conversation.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“There’s something you need to know, Admiral, about Ben and me.  Chewie, Rose, you’re here because we’d like a trustworthy friend to know.”  Rey took a deep breath, let it out slowly.  “Ben and I have a Force connection to each other.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Chewie let out a puzzled hissing sort of sound.  Rose simply stared, confusion all over her face. The Mon Calamari was harder to read.  Though he appeared expressionless, Ben thought he’d seen a slight movement where eyebrows would be on someone else.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben started the explanation.  “Rey and I are a dyad in the Force.  Two that are one.  We are able to communicate over vast distances, most often when one of us is experiencing strong emotions.  When we connect, we can see each other, but no one else can.  It has grown stronger as time has gone by.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey nodded, taking up the rest of the story as they knew it.  “At first, it was just communication and a sense of the other’s feelings.  As it grew, we could touch physically whenever the bond activated.  Now, we’re capable of sending objects to each other.  On Exegol, I successfully sent Ben a lightsaber.  We just haven’t learned any control over it yet.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I see.”  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Though, it was obvious to Ben that the admiral didn’t really.  Who could, except for the two experiencing it?  The air in the room felt charged, heavy, and he thought he knew why.  The question hung out there, not asked and not answered.  Did they really want to know?  Would one of them ask it?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Admiral Ackbar finally did.  “For how long?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And there it was.  The attempt to discover how compromised the Resistance had been.  Once they learned, would they turn on Rey?  He actually hoped, for her sake, that they didn’t.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“From the moment I met Rey, I knew there was something different about her.  I tried to take information from her, but I couldn’t.  Any time the Force connected us, I could not see her surroundings.  She simply appeared to be wherever I was.  All of your secrets were safe.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Why are you telling me this now?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey leaned forward, an almost beseeching expression on her face.  “Because, Admiral, we may need you to dispel any odd rumors.  Until Ben and I can figure out a way to block the connection when it tries to activate, there’s a good chance others will witness what would appear to be a one-sided conversation.  I hate to say it, but people are already wary of Ben.  If they happen to catch him during a moment we’re connected … ”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I see your point.  I thank you for bringing this to me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben, more than ready to leave, merely tilted his head in acknowledgment.  Rey, though, wasn’t done.  “One more thing.  Poe and Finn.  Well, Poe, mostly.  He may spread it around that Ben almost killed him.  While true, you should know the real story.  Ben had been in a very deep meditative state; he didn’t hear Poe come up behind him and it startled him.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Admiral Ackbar nodded as best he could.  “And instinct is to defend oneself.  Understandable.  I think I will speak to Dameron.  I can’t do anything for his mistrust, however.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know.  I’m hoping the two will come to their senses.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rose spoke for the first time, brows raised.  “And I suppose that’s where I come in?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“If you think it will help them understand, then share what we told you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben, feeling as if he could collapse any moment, forced himself to his feet.  “Forgive me, Admiral, but I must go.”  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Beside him, Rey jumped to her feet.  Without waiting for a response from the much-revered New Republic and Resistance leader, Ben walked away, a little light-headed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I told you not to overdo it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben couldn’t even muster the energy to argue. Reaching his quarters, he let Rey help him to his bed.  He did raise his eyebrows in question when she lay down beside him, cuddling into his side.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Testing a theory,” was all the answer she gave him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rolling to his side and cradling her back to his chest, Ben finally felt secure enough to succumb to the sleep he desperately needed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Weak sunlight filtered in through his window and raised voices reached his ears.  Those were the two things Ben instantly noticed when he next opened his eyes.  Glancing at the clock beside his bed, he received a little jolt of shock.  Had he really slept all day </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>the night?  The rumble in his stomach exclaimed mightily that he must have.  Though his head no longer hurt, his mind still felt a bit muddled.  Whether it was simply from catching up on sleep or from his experiment yesterday, only time would tell.  The voices - he could now distinguish they belonged to Rey and Dameron - grew louder.  Or, rather, Dameron’s did.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Seriously, Rey?  From what Finn said, he’s been in your head for over a year!  Influencing you!  Twisting you!  And now, I find out you’ve been </span>
  <em>
    <span>here</span>
  </em>
  <span> with him all yesterday and last night?!  What are you thinking?!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In contrast to Dameron, Rey hissed her response.  “Ssh, Poe!  Don’t you dare wake Ben!  He’s finally getting some decent sleep.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You really think I care about that?  I hope his dreams are haunted by every little thing he’s done.  It’s what he deserves.  I’m more concerned about you.  You’re not thinking straight.  If you just stayed away from him for a while, away from his influence, you’ll see I’m right.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Poe, for the last time, you’re not my father.  You’re not my brother.  You have no say in what I choose to do.  I thought you’d understand if you knew the truth.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am </span>
  </em>
  <span>your friend, though, Rey.  And, no, I can’t understand how you can be connected, bonded, whatever you want to call it, to someone like </span>
  <em>
    <span>him</span>
  </em>
  <span>.  It doesn’t make any sense.  Sounds like something he’s made up.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben let out a nearly inaudible groan.  So much for the non-existent headache.  No matter.  Rey didn’t have to fight battles for him.  It did feel amazing that she was willing to.  It had been a very long time since anyone had defended him so fiercely.  More of what Dameron had said trickled into his brain.  She’d stayed with him.  All day </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>night.  He vaguely remembered waking up at one point, but the feel of her in his arms, the way she soothed him, helped him return to sleep.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The voices in the other room lowered but he’d heard enough.  Tossing back the blankets he didn’t remember using and checking to make sure he was decently dressed - yesterday’s clothes but they’d do for now - Ben brushed through his hair and left the room.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“As I told </span>
  <em>
    <span>him </span>
  </em>
  <span>yesterday, you shouldn’t be training with him.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey growled irritably.  “Poe, there’s literally no one else left.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Train by yourself.  You’ve been doing alright on your own.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Stepping into the room, Ben interjected before Rey could respond.  “That would most likely lead her to the Dark side.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Like you </span>
  <em>
    <span>wouldn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey spun to face Ben, the anger melting from her expression to be replaced with guilt.  “You shouldn’t be up.  We woke you, didn’t we?  How do you feel?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Her concern was a soothing balm to his soul.  He didn’t think he’d ever tire of feeling it and hoped it never went away.  Ignoring Dameron, Ben closed the distance between himself and Rey, and smoothed away the furrow in her brow with his thumb before tracing her nose, cheek, and jaw.  Normally, such a gesture in front of an audience would have him feeling utterly self-conscious, but he couldn’t allow her to feel anxious or guilty over something as trivial as his awakening.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m fine.”  Rey gave him an assessing look that clearly said she didn’t believe him.  “Better than yesterday, at least.”  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She offered him a tender smile that had him longing to kiss her.  “You do look better.  A few more nights of solid sleep will help.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>More nights with Rey at his side?  Yes, please!  Wait.  She may not have intended that the way he’d taken it.  The laughter in her eyes said all too well that she knew where his thoughts had gone.  The Force subtly shifted, bringing her mental comments to his head.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I meant exactly what you were thinking.  You barely dreamed.  The only time you did, I was able to pull you out of it so you could get back to sleep.  If me being at your side is what it takes, then that’s where I’m going to be.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I could definitely get used to that</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Ben returned with a full smile.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A loud throat-clearing brought his attention back to the other person in the room.  “Dameron, let’s get something straight.  You don’t like me; I understand that.  To be honest, I don’t care anymore.  What I do care about is how you’re hurting Rey with all the accusations and not actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>listening </span>
  </em>
  <span>to what she’s telling you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m concerned for her.  It’s called being a friend.  Something I’m sure you would know nothing about.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben clenched his jaw, barely biting back the words he wanted to hurl at the other man.  What he wouldn’t give to simply Mind Trick him and be done with it.  A snicker from Rey had him turning his attention back to her, realizing their link never closed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>It wouldn’t solve anything, though, Ben.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I know.  It’s why I wouldn’t do it.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>It could be good for a little payback, but no, better not.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Right.  That’s a slippery slope too easy to slide down.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“So, now I’m going to be ignored as well as lectured?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey turned away from Ben and waved in Poe’s direction.  “You wouldn’t be lectured if you would just </span>
  <em>
    <span>listen</span>
  </em>
  <span>!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A frantic knock banged on the door.  Ben felt like groaning.  It was too early for this.  What he really wanted was to maybe eat a little and go back to bed, Rey in his arms.  Expelling a breath, he rubbed his forehead before opening the door with a truncated wave of his hand.  Finn stood on the other side of the threshold.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Spying Poe, he rushed in and grabbed the pilot’s arm.  “Come on.  I think you’ve done enough damage.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Me?  What are you talking about?”  Poe whirled to stare accusingly at Rey and Ben in turn.  “What have you done to Finn?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They haven’t done anything to me.  I’ve just given everything a lot of thought, discussed it all with Rose, and it made me realize that if I didn’t change my way of thinking, I’d alienate Rey.  She’s already said who it was she’d choose if she was forced to make one.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Without saying anything else, Finn pulled Poe out the door.  Well, that was … odd.  If the former stormtrooper was insincere about his change of heart, well, he’d have to answer for that.  Rey had been hurt enough.  Ben would not sit idly by and allow her so-called friends to toy with her feelings, regardless of it solidifying others’ poor opinion of him.  What he said to Dameron was mostly the truth.  He </span>
  <em>
    <span>didn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>care what some people thought of him.  The ones Rey cared about were the ones he had wished to find some level of acceptance with.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, that was … “</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Odd?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>With a snicker, Rey turned away from the door to face him.  Wrapping her arms around his waist, she corrected him.  “Encouraging, Ben.  That was encouraging.  He might actually get through to Poe.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As she stood there looking up at him with hope and happiness shining in eyes that were both green and brown, it dawned on him she had loosened her hair.  It fell just past her shoulders in soft waves.  Catching his fascination, he repeatedly ran a hand through it, watching it glide smoothly through his fingers, enjoying its slippery silkiness.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You rarely wear it down.  You should do it more often.  The first time I saw you like this I wanted to touch it, to see if it was as soft as it looked.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>With a teasing expression, Rey asked, “Is </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>why you seemed a little distracted?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He hadn’t been the only one at the time but didn’t bother mentioning that.  He’d thought he’d masked his interest during that conversation.  Quite obviously, he’d been wrong and, now, he found it a little embarrassing that he’d been that transparent.  He shrugged self-consciously, a grin toying with the corners of her mouth.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I should have known I couldn’t hide anything from you.  You proved that in our first meeting.  It angered and terrified me that you had the ability to look into my soul and see what was there, to see things no one else knew.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey snorted.  “</span>
  <em>
    <span>You </span>
  </em>
  <span>were terrified?  Here I was, caught by the much-feared, infamous, merciless, Kylo Ren and he could get into my head enough to learn things about me I hadn’t even acknowledged.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>That </span>
  </em>
  <span>was terrifying.  And talking to me so softly only made it more so.”  Her hands slid up his chest to rest at the nape of his neck, giving him an impish grin.  “Now, if I’d known the true person under that persona was a fractured soul in need of help, someone as cute and cuddly as an Ewok, I wouldn’t have been so scared.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Oh, she was going to pay for that one!  Pulling her against his chest, Ben leaned forward until their noses almost touched, his normally-soft voice deepening to an intimate whisper.  “An Ewok?  You wound me.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Against his lips, Rey murmured, “I guess I’ll have to heal you, then.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Just like that, she’d turned the tables on him, calling his bluff, trapping his breath in his lungs.  Her warm, shortened breaths feathering his lips added a level of intimacy he hadn’t expected.  He could kiss her … right now.  Needed to, in fact.  So, why wasn’t he, again?  With a small sound of surrender, he took what he wanted.  Once.  Twice.  Not enough.  Never enough.  Eventually needing to breathe, he trailed kisses along her jaw, down her neck to the pulse point that matched his own beat for beat.  Dipping lower to reach her collarbone, she rewarded him with a tiny eager sound.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Without noticeable warning, her breathless voice sounded in his head.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>That feels so good!  Don’t stop!  </span>
  </em>
  <span>Her fingers tangled in his hair, holding him in place.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Never, </span>
  </em>
  <span>was all he could manage to reply.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Wait, no.  Come back up here.  I need to kiss you.  </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Moving in to kiss her again, the tip of her tongue shyly slid over his lip to lightly touch his, wrenching from him a moan of pleasure he couldn’t suppress.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh, gods, Rey!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Following her lead, Ben did some exploring of his own, receiving a gasp and pleasure-filled purr for his efforts, punctuated by the sharp rise in desire that bled through their bond.  Encouraged he did the right thing, he further explored the moist heat, the dance of her tongue with his setting him further ablaze, leaving him weak and trembling.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Without conscious thought, he lifted her, shuddering in exquisite delight when her legs wrapped around his waist.  This new position afforded him better access to her graceful neck and Ben took full advantage, especially when Rey tipped her head backward with a needy little sound.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Ben!  Please!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Feathering kisses over her soft, heated skin, he skimmed down one side and up the other as far as he could reach.  Again, Rey turned things around on him and trailed kisses along his jaw to a spot just behind his ear, his breath hitching at the touch, little bursts of shuddering heat exploding inside.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>God, Rey!  That’s …   Do it again!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Suddenly needing her closer, Ben backed her against the nearest wall to brace against, his hands cradling her head.  Full chest to waist contact.  It both eased and intensified his need for more.  An impossible dilemma that had him moaning in frustration.  In response, Rey tightened her hold on him, as if she understood.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I want - </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>To Ben’s everlasting mortification, his stomach chose that moment to protest its emptiness loud and clear, dissipating the sensuous fog that had clouded his thinking, and freezing him, mid-kiss, in place, their link slamming shut.  Awkwardness filled the moment as desire faded away.  Frantically, he tried to come up with a way to extricate himself from their current position - preferably </span>
  <em>
    <span>without </span>
  </em>
  <span>her noticing just how much he’d been affected physically.  Too bad he couldn’t seem to think of anything sounding remotely reasonable or without giving her the opposite impression, that he hadn’t enjoyed what they’d shared, not realizing at that moment they’d connected for a time.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Taking in Rey’s kiss-swollen lips, flushed cheeks, mussed hair, and clearing gaze, he almost winced.  It shouldn’t have gone that far.  “Rey … “  His voice came out hoarsely, his throat parched.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know.  Neither of us intended for it to get out of hand, but Ben, I don’t regret it, either.  That was the most amazing thing I’ve ever felt.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Relieved and happy she felt as he did, Ben grinned from ear to ear, slowly easing from the wall to let her down.  Self-consciousness set in and he took a huge step backward, his stomach growling again.  Feeling his cheeks burn he cleared his throat again.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m, uh, going to take a shower.  We can get back to your training.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Food first.  You must be starving after barely eating yesterday.  I’ll run by and get us something.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey walked to the cafeteria with a spring in her step, her thoughts on what had just happened in Ben’s quarters.  How far it would have gone, she hadn’t a clue, but oh, it had been incredible!  She’d felt as if she’d been set on fire from the inside!  She softly snorted.  And she had thought the kisses they had shared during the celebrations had been wonderful.  They had been, of course, but what she and Ben just shared was on a completely different level.  She hadn’t even known that level existed!  Remembering his embarrassment afterward set her to giggling.  Poor Ben.  She shook her head.  Sometimes he was too adorable for words.  She felt privileged that she got to see that.  She never would have pegged him as the insecure type until she had met him.  Even then, he knew what he wanted and went after it.  Seeing his bashfulness was unbelievably endearing.  She’d never given it any thought, but it made sense.  He couldn’t be any more experienced than she.  Could he?  He certainly kissed as if he had.  No, he seemed way too shy.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I see </span>
  <em>
    <span>someone </span>
  </em>
  <span>has had a good time.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Startled from her thoughts, Rey looked up to find Rose grinning, coming her way.  Despite having spent a lot of time apart, she and Rose had managed to form a strong friendship.  It was why she had wanted the woman to sit in on the meeting with the admiral.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>As the other woman joined her, Rey casually asked, “What makes you say that?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The woman laughed.  “Well, let me list the ways.  Your hair is down and messy.  Your clothes are yesterday’s clothes and are badly wrinkled.  You show every sign of having been thoroughly kissed.  So, am I right?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Blushing furiously, Rey glanced around them, glad that it was still very early.  Not many were up and around yet.  “If you </span>
  <em>
    <span>must </span>
  </em>
  <span>know, my clothes are a mess because I stayed with Ben last night.”  Rose’s brows jumped in shock.  “Not like that.  He’s been having some really awful nightmares, keeping him awake.  I thought I’d try something.  It worked, too.  He only dreamed once and, even then, I was able to counter it so he could go back to sleep.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rose tipped her head to the side.  “Okay, I can accept that.  Not that I care what you do anyway.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Curious about that, Rey had to ask.  “I wanted to ask you.  Not that I’m not thankful or anything, but how is it that you can accept Ben and me so easily?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’ll admit to being stunned, but I figure I don’t know a thing about the Force.  That’s not my area of expertise.  I can only assume that it knows what it’s doing.  I think it put you two together because you were the only one who could put an end to Kylo Ren, the only one who could reach Ben and bring him back.  I believe that’s been - no pun intended - the plan all along.”  She shrugged.  “Call me a romantic.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh.  I’m glad you can look at it like that.  I had hoped Finn and Poe would trust me, but that hasn’t exactly been the case.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rosie looked away, shuffling.  “Yeah, I was a bit disappointed in Finn, but I think he’s beginning to come around.  Poe, well, this may be hard to hear, but I think he kind of has a thing for you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Had she heard that correctly?  Poe?  Poe Dameron?  Great Resistance fighter pilot Poe Dameron?  No, surely not.  They fought all the time!  There’s no way he was interested in her </span>
  <em>
    <span>like that</span>
  </em>
  <span>!</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But … he argues with me about everything!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“To hide his feelings.  He’s a hothead, I’ll grant you that, but he’s also a good friend.  He’ll readjust to how things are now.  Just give him a little time.  Now, enough about Finn and Poe.  I want to hear the juicy details.  I suppose, with you looking like that, that it’s a safe assumption that the former Black Knight of the galaxy knows how to give a kiss.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey hurriedly scanned their surroundings before taking Rose by the arm and leading her back the direction the woman had come.  “Walk with me.  I told Ben I’d get us something to eat.  He hasn’t eaten since the meeting with Admiral Ackbar.  As for the kisses … ”  She quickly checked to make sure they were still alone.  “I thought the ones we shared during the celebrations were something but they paled in comparison to this morning’s kisses.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rose laughed, nodding her head as if she completely understood.  “Got you hot and bothered, did they?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey dropped her face into her hands in embarrassment.  “Yes, that’s exactly how I felt.  It was … sublime.  I’ve never felt like that before.  Then again, I’ve never kissed anyone before.  I’ve never felt so out of control.  It felt … </span>
  <em>
    <span>good</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It certainly can when it’s the right person.  So, what started this little make-out session?  I mean, I know Finn ran over there thinking Poe was there.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey scowled at the memory.  “Oh, he was, spouting his displeasure at where I’d been all night and most of the day yesterday.  He didn’t even try to listen.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I did say he was a hothead.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But anyway, when Finn came over and dragged Poe away, I told Ben it was encouraging that Finn seemed to be changing his mind.  We were talking and,” Rey bit her lip in amusement, “I kind of compared Ben to an Ewok, said he was cute and cuddly.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rose threw her head back and laughed heartily.  “I’m sure that went over well.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey grinned back.  “He leaned in as if he was going to kiss me but didn’t for a long time.  Then, he did, and it was like, I don’t know, a star had exploded or something.  All I know is, I felt like I couldn’t get enough.”  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey rubbed the back of her neck, a little embarrassed to be talking about this but also wanted to get someone’s thoughts on it all.  Rose was the only one she could go to.  “Uh, Rose, can I ask you something a little personal?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Has Finn ever, uh, picked you up, you know, while you were kissing?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Haven’t had that pleasure yet.  I take it you have.  Tell me you did the sensible thing and wrapped yourself around him.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You mean I was supposed to?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rose abruptly stopped and gaped at Rey.  “You mean you didn’t?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I did, I just didn’t know that’s what was expected.  It felt right, anyway.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rose shook her head and playfully jabbed Rey’s arm.  “You had me going there for a moment.  “Well, did Ben complain?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No.  He, uh, kind of leaned us against a wall, actually.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey had to stutter-step to avoid running into her friend when her friend stopped a second time and faced her, looking a bit anxious.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Uh, Rey, how much do you know about, you know, sex?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Heat flared into Rey’s face.  Even her ears burned.  “Oh.  I know the basics, what goes where, and how babies are made.  All of that.  I’m not that clueless.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rose held up her hands.  “Okay.  Okay.  Just thought I’d ask.”  They resumed walking again.  “Well, sounds as if I was right, then.  You </span>
  <em>
    <span>did </span>
  </em>
  <span>enjoy yourself.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey laughed.  “Yes, I did.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>
      <br/>
      <br/>
    </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Training didn’t go as well as she had hoped.  Her mind kept wandering back to that morning’s kisses.  Then, there was Ben’s skill and grace, his complete confidence and slight cockiness when dueling to admire.  A spike of irritation that wasn’t her own told her his patience was waning.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sorry.  I’m trying.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you?  I’m not entirely convinced.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That was uncalled for.  Irritated now, herself, Rey nearly yelled, “Of course I’m trying!  What do you expect when you kiss me like you did this morning?  All I can think about is doing it again!”  She immediately slapped a hand over her mouth, eyes wide.  She hadn’t meant to say that.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben deactivated his lightsaber and stalked toward her.  Rey gulped.  She’d done it now.  She felt like prey to his predator.  He didn’t say a word when he reached her, merely lifted his empty hand, cupped the back of her head, and kissed her.  Fiercely, with the tiniest brush of his tongue against hers.  Quick as it came, it left.  Way too soon in her opinion.  A little noise of frustration sounded in her throat.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You haven’t been the only one, Rey, but we do need to focus.  Two hours.  Two hours of solid work and I’ll gladly give you time to indulge in whatever activity you choose.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Wait.  He’d been distracted?  </span>
  <em>
    <span>That </span>
  </em>
  <span>was how he dueled when distracted?  The fact she’d managed to keep him off-balance enough he actually kissed her, brought a smug grin to her face.  The remainder of what he said finally registered.  Two hours?  For a reward such as their morning activity?  By the cosmos, yes!  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Feeling bold, Rey slid a hand up over Ben’s chest, and as flirtatiously as possible, she said, “If you think you can last two hours.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben’s brows rose, his gaze dipped to her lips and swallowed.  His expression went blank as he stepped away, reactivating his lightsaber, smirked, and gave her a motion of his hand that clearly said </span>
  <em>
    <span>Bring it</span>
  </em>
  <span>.  Oh, she’d bring it alright.  Taking a moment to enjoy the look of happiness on his face, Rey hoped to see it much more.  While trying to keep an eye on Ben, she glanced around the clearing for something she could use.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t rely on your eyes, Rey.  They can deceive you.  In fact, close them.  I’ll even close mine if that will make you feel better.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Close her eyes.  It was one thing to do that against a training droid but against a human opponent, one as good as Ben?  Drawing in a deep breath, she closed her eyes and reached out with her senses, immediately dodging something flying at her from the right.  Noting a fallen branch behind Ben, she sent it his way, which, naturally, he caught and destroyed with ease.  Finding several stones, she used them - all while still parrying his various attacks, the hums and crackling of their lightsabers filling the area.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>On impulse, Rey Force-shoved him hard enough to knock him off balance.  To her shock, he actually hit the ground.  Eyes flying open, she stared down at Ben in disbelief, out of breath, her blade inches from his chest.  Rather than looking perturbed at his situation, he appeared pleased, out of breath himself.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That was good, Rey.  I should have thought of it.  I’ve even done it myself in other battles.  Rest assured, I’ll remember to use that tactic in our future duels.  However, don’t assume I’ve been safely handled.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Swinging his blade upward, Rey parried it, and found herself flying through the air.  Somersaulting through the freefall and using the Force to land easily a few feet away, she slowly walked a perimeter around him, watching for the slightest muscle spasm or twitch of a finger to give away his next intentions.  Nothing.  He simply burst into action, lightsaber swinging and objects flying.  It was all Rey could do to keep up.  She attempted the shove again, but Ben merely planted his feet and pushed back, obviously ready for that maneuver.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Over and over they clashed, battled, did their best to beat the other.  Whenever they came together, Rey could have sworn she saw a smile twitching his lips, bringing out one of her own.  After a bit, the tone of their practice shifted from serious to teasing to mutual flirtation as desire flared between them.  The attacks slowed to nearly non-existent before they gave up any possible remaining pretense and came together a final time to share an intense kiss.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When it ended, Ben smiled down at her.  “I knew if you were motivated enough, you’d concentrate.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Playfully, Rey shoved him backward, but then his words fully registered.  Had he lied to her to get her to do what he wanted?  The thought hurt.  She had to know for sure.  “So, your admittance to having been distracted was a ploy?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben’s amusement instantly faded as he moved close to her, one hand rising to slide into her hair, his thumb brushing softly over her cheek.  “I was honest with you, Rey.  I was more irritated with myself for my own wandering thoughts than with you for yours.  I thought I should have been able to put you from my mind.  Again, I should have known better.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Okay, so now, she felt horrible for having doubted him.  “I’m sorry, Ben.  I shouldn’t have questioned you.”  When he pressed a kiss to her forehead, it actually made her feel worse, setting loose a single tear.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I have a lot to make up for, Rey.  I know that.  This is new for both of us.  I imagine it’ll take some time to adjust.”  His arms fully surrounded her.  “Now, if, a year or two from now, you’re still unable to trust me completely, then we may have some trouble.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>With a tearful chuckle, Rey wrapped her arms around Ben’s waist and held on tightly, never wanting to let go.  She even buried her face against his shoulder.  This man was unbelievable.  Instead of ranting about her lack of trust - which would have been his right - he simply held her and dismissed it as if it meant nothing.  She feared he would, one day soon, decide she wasn’t worth it.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I can’t lose you again.  </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You won’t, Rey.  We’re a dyad, remember?  Two who are one.  It will always be that way.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey sniffed and chuckled.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>So, you’re stuck with me, then.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I wouldn’t call it stuck, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Turning into his neck, Rey lightly kissed him.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Rose thinks bringing you back was the Force’s plan all along, and that it chose me because I was the only one capable of doing it.  I don’t know, though.  It doesn’t make much sense to me.  As you once said, I’m nobody.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I shouldn’t have said that, Rey.  It wasn’t true.  You were and are someone to me.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>As you are to me, Ben.  That’s why I fear I’ll do something to ruin things.  I have no experience at - </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>And you think I do?  Trust me, Rey.  I’m about as clueless as one can get when it comes to this kind of thing.  Relationships were taboo for those following the Jedi path.  Luke drummed that into us often enough.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe that’s where they went wrong.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben shrugged the shoulder that Rey wasn’t occupying.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe.  </span>
  </em>
  <span>For a moment, there was silence between them.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>I want to go to Ilum, to the Crystal Caves.  I need to build my own weapon.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey lifted her head from his shoulder to look into his eyes.  The depth to which he felt that need didn’t surprise her; she felt the same.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Then, let’s plan the trip.  I want to go as soon as possible.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Alright.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Poe stood near the clearing, hidden among the trees and plants.  He didn’t care what anyone said; he was going to watch out for Rey.  He would </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>let her be alone with Ren.  Leaning against a tree, arms crossed, he vigilantly watched while she and Ren performed aerial gymnastics dodging weapons and objects.  He straightened when Ren shut off his lightsaber, tensing as the evil Force-user approached Rey, ready to jump in if necessary.  He nearly gagged when Ren grabbed Rey and kissed her.  Poe thanked the Universe when it ended quickly.  How could Rey let herself be handled like that?  How could she tolerate his touch?  A full-body shudder took hold of him.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He let out a relieved sigh when they went back to dueling.  At one point, Rey knocked Ren onto his ass, and Poe nearly let out a shout of joy.  Of course, that joy was short-lived.  Within seconds, Ren was back up and practically throwing everything at Rey, bombarding her repeatedly.  A growl tried to work its way up Poe’s throat, but he just managed to swallow it.  As the intensity waned, Poe began to relax, believing they would be quitting soon.  It didn’t take long for him to discover he was right, but not in the way he wanted to see.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>His stomach soured as he watched the two of them share another kiss, this one more intense and lasting longer than the previous one.  Poe’s hands curled into fists, wanting very badly to go out there and pummel the guy until he released Rey.  She was too young, too inexperienced, too caught up in the middle of it all, to realize what Ren was doing to her, what mind games he was obviously playing with her.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The kiss finally ended, the two talked, and then Rey suddenly looked upset over something.  Damn!  Ren must have said something to hurt her.  He knew it!  Poe had known it would only be a matter of time.  He’d nearly moved when they hugged and were completely silent for a long time.  When Rey kissed Ren again, Poe, disgusted, stalked off.  He’d find a way to make her see exactly what Ren was up to if it was the last thing he ever did.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They want to </span>
  <em>
    <span>what?!</span>
  </em>
  <span>”  Rey jumped in front of Ben, her arms spread wide to shield him.  She couldn’t believe her ears!  Arrest Ben?  “But why?  Kylo Ren doesn’t exist any longer!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“They are not certain of that.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ben saved my life!  What more proof could they need?  Can’t you convince them, Admiral?  How did they know he was here anyway?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The bulbous orange eyes of Admiral Ackbar flicked between herself and Ben.  “I’m afraid someone alerted them.  They refuse to say whom.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>In his typical, soft-spoken manner, Ben asked, “Why are you telling us this?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Because I’m of the opinion that Ben Solo has paid enough in his young life.  Might I suggest an impromptu trip?  Take the Falcon.  It’s already been supplied.  Chewie’s there waiting.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey exchanged uncertain looks with Ben before addressing the Mon Calamari.  “How will you explain our leaving?  I think I can speak for Ben in that neither of us wants you reprimanded.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The admiral simply shrugged.  “I just received the orders.  I can’t be held responsible if you decide to leave before I can carry them out.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“How did you explain not arresting him on sight?  It’s not as if no one knew his face.”  She turned back to Ben.  “Not exactly smart, showing your face on Crait.  Or anywhere else.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“The danger of distractions.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Despite the serious situation they found themselves in, Rey laughed.  “Dangerous, indeed.  Well, we were just talking about going to - ”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Admiral Ackbar held up a hand - flipper? - to stop her.  “It’s best if I am unaware of where you plan to go.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Alright, but we’ll be back.  I won’t let them ostracize him, otherwise, no one learned anything.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey felt Ben’s hands on her shoulders.  “Rey - ”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No, Ben.  I won’t have you looking over your shoulder from now on.  That’s no life.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And I won’t have you living on the outskirts because you’re with me!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey spun around, arms crossed over her chest.  “Two who are one, remember?  Where you go, I go.  I’ll talk to them.  I’ll </span>
  <em>
    <span>convince </span>
  </em>
  <span>them.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Perhaps you should continue this disagreement on the ship.  If you wait much longer, I will have no choice but to follow through with my orders.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Taking Ben by the hand, Rey thanked the admiral and dragged Ben back to his quarters.  “Get whatever you need.  I’ll do the same.  I want to find Rose to let her know what’s happening.  I’ll meet you at the Falcon.”  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She gave him a quick kiss and rushed off.  As luck would have it, she came across Rose and informed her friend of the impending orders and trip.  After a brief hug goodbye and a promise to return to Coruscant where the seat of the government currently sat, Rey returned to her quarters, threw whatever she had into a bag - which wasn’t much - and hurried out to the Falcon, not surprised to see Ben already there.  She couldn’t see his face, but the tension in his stance as he looked at the ship had her heart clenching.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You want to pilot her?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Ben turned to face her.  What he felt wasn’t obvious in his expression, but his eyes gave him away.  “You do it.  You’ve plenty of experience.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Rey shook her head.  “I don’t think so.  I think she deserves to be piloted by a Solo again.  Besides, you know where we’re going.  You’ve been there before.”  Taking his hand, she gave it a little tug.  “Come on.  We should go.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Letting Chewie take the co-pilot’s seat, Rey strapped into the one behind Ben and silently said goodbye to everyone as Ben gently lifted them off the ground.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
    </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
      <br/>
    </em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em></em>
    <br/>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </b>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Love, Friendship, Intimacy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Lightsabers are remade.  What colors will they have?  Intimacy is explored.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here's where one of the tags comes into play.   The lightsaber photos are courtesy of ultrasabers.com.  I actually own Ben's and I love it but it's definitely heavy and made for someone Adam Driver's size.  LOL</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>… when one of them meets the other half, the actual half of himself … the pair are lost in an amazement of love and friendship and intimacy … </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>-- Plato, The Symposium</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>After a brief stop to stock up on winter gear that would be necessary on Ilum, Ben set a course for Rago, a world nearly due east of the icy planet.  From there, he’d have to allow the Force to guide him the remainder of the way.  Admiral Ackbar’s orders hadn’t truly surprised Ben in the least.  Deep down, he’d known he’d have to pay for what he’d done.  He feared leaving the way they had would put a Marker upon his head and turn Rey and Chewie into fugitives.  Neither of them deserved that, but neither of them would let him go anywhere alone, either.  He loved them for it, even as he hated it.  Successfully making the jump into hyperspace, Ben fell back into his seat with a contemplative sigh.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You want to talk about it?” came Rey’s soft question behind him.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chewie looked them both over with an assessing tilt of his head before making himself scarce.  Rey took the vacated seat and turned to face him, waiting for his response.  The thing was, Ben wasn’t sure what to say.  He didn’t know how to put into words just what it was he felt because he wasn’t certain just what he did feel.  Leave it to Rey to accomplish what he couldn’t.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It feels odd sitting there, doesn’t it?  Where he used to sit?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben nodded, still staring out the cockpit window.  “I never thought I would.  I wanted to.  For a while.  Just him, me, and Chewie.  A foolish child’s dream.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No, just a child’s dream.  You </span>
  <em>
    <span>were </span>
  </em>
  <span>a child, Ben.  Every child dreams of doing things with their parents.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Oh, how incredibly selfish he’d been!  Here he was complaining about not getting family time when he’d been young and Rey hadn’t any at all!  Didn’t even know who her parents were!  Very nice, Ben.  Good job in showing her how much you care.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I shouldn’t be complaining.  At least I did have them for a while.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Why shouldn’t you?”  Suddenly, his chair was whirled around to face her.  “Ben, don’t.  I don’t want you afraid to say something to me.  I want to know what you’re thinking.  I may not have known my birth family, but I know the one I have now.  That’s all that counts.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>How did she do it?  How did she know exactly what to say to ease his discomfort?  Reaching across the short distance and capturing her hand, he pulled her from the co-pilot seat to his lap.  Dropping kisses on her forehead, nose, then a lingering one on her lips, Ben let out a small sigh.  He had never expected his life to take this turn.  He wondered if he would have ever met Rey if Kylo Ren hadn’t been in existence.  Surely, they would have.  The two of them formed a dyad.  Would they, though, if it hadn’t been necessary?  That wasn’t something he wanted to think about.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What are you thinking?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Reflecting on what I have now, rather than what I didn’t have a long time ago.”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben couldn’t remember ever feeling this happy, except maybe when he learned Rey returned his feelings.  He may not have the words to express what he felt, but he could certainly show her.  Allowing those positive feelings to take him over, he eagerly kissed her, losing himself in the strong desire she always brought out in him.  Her little moan spurred him onward, pulling her as close as he could with one arm and the other hand tangling in her hair.  The kisses, the taste of her, her eagerness were Heaven.  Not feeling close enough?  That was Hell, his frustration manifesting in the form of a groan low in his throat.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A very loud growl followed by a litany of other noises startled Ben so badly he jumped.  He and Rey had just been caught by Chewie.  Wonderful.  His face aflame, he let the annoyed Wookie have his say.  Rey buried her face into the back of the seat, her shoulders shaking with suppressed laughter.  Her lips grazed his jaw just behind his ear, sending another delicious shudder running through him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chewie growled again and Ben had to furiously think what it was the Wookie had asked.  Out of breath, his voice husky, he replied, “Of course, I’m listening, Chewie.”  Another little kiss distracted him again until Chewie’s next words registered.  “No.  We don’t need a chaperone.  I promise.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The Wookiee’s final parting muttered words had Ben blushing even more.  Rey, fully laughing now, lifted her head to meet his gaze.  “Sounds like you’re more like your father than you thought.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Sheepishly, Ben chuckled.  “I suppose.  I really didn’t need to know how many times Chewie had walked in on them, however.  Some things are better left unsaid.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey shifted on his lap so she could tuck into him a little more comfortably, one hand resting in the crook of his neck, her pinky and ring finger slipping inside his collar.  Ben suddenly realized another rather embarrassing thing.  There was no way to hide his response to her.  He waited for a forthcoming comment but nothing was said.  Was it possible she actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>hadn’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>noticed?  With her hip pressed against him as it was?  No, it wasn’t possible.  Wait.  What if she didn’t have any idea what it meant?  Rey had practically raised herself, after all.  Who would have explained such things to her?  Ben practically cringed at the thought of having that conversation.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What is it you’re thinking so hard about?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Clearing his throat, Ben pretended to readjust his position so he could slide her away from the incriminating evidence, his face and ears practically glowing with heat.  “Nothing in particular.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey chuckled.  She actually chuckled.  “Liar.  It’s okay, though.  I think I might have an idea.  You don’t have to worry about it.  You certainly don’t have to hide.  Does that help?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It does.  Listen, Rey, I hope you know I would never, uh, push you into something you’re not comfortable with.”  He received a kiss to his cheek.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re so cute when you’re flustered, you know that?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben laughed and wryly replied, “This isn’t exactly a normal topic of conversation for me.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I can count the number of times I’ve had a conversation like this on one hand and have fingers left over.  I’m just saying that I’m so used to seeing you as nothing but confident.”  With a teasing smile, she added, “It’s nice to see you’re just as human as the rest of us.  And, yes, I know you wouldn’t.  As if I’d let you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Relieved to be able to leave that conversation behind, Ben moved on to something less personal.  “It’ll take a few days to get there.  Maybe we can get some training in.  I wish I had a remote for you to practice against.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I have one.  It’s one of the few things I kept once I left … ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben, determined not to take anything else away from Rey, used nearly the exact words she had earlier.  “You can say his name, Rey.  I know he meant something to you.  I know they all did.  Don’t think I didn’t notice your avoidance of mentioning my father earlier.  Don’t ever be afraid to mention them for fear of hurting me.  I’m … slowly … coming to terms with everything.”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He paused to figure out how to say exactly what he wanted, to express what he thought without giving Rey the wrong idea.  “I’ve come to realize they were human and capable of making mistakes.  If given the chance, I’m not so certain I would change anything.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No?  Why not?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Turning to the Dark side, becoming who I was, is what gave me you.  I’m convinced that, if things had been different, there would have been no need for a dyad.  You’d just be out there, maybe still stuck on Jakku, and I would never have met you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“There’s always a balance in the Force, Ben.  That’s what … Luke … told me.  If it hadn’t been you, it would have been someone else.  I think the dyad still would have formed.  I believe we would have found each other.  One way or another.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Nothing more was said.  Not because she’d convinced him.  He was a pessimist by nature, having learned the negative attitude from the best of them.  Oh, he had his moments of optimism, but they were few and far between.  No, he kept silent because he enjoyed relaxing with Rey in his arms too much to potentially upset her by disagreeing with her.  He hoped …  Mentally, he laughed.  He’d been doing a lot of that lately.  More than he ever allowed himself before.  He hoped she was right, that they would have still met if circumstances had been different.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A few minutes later, Ben stood and set Rey on her feet.  “Get your remote.  Might as well get a little training done.  It’s going to be a long few days.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He had no idea just how right he would be.  Despite Ben’s statement of not needing a chaperone, the Wookie took it upon himself to be wherever Ben and Rey were, which annoyed Ben to the extreme.  He yearned to have some private time with her, even if it was simply to sit and hold each other - though he wouldn’t refuse any kisses.  Training sessions were doubly difficult when one’s every action was being watched.  His temper shortened and he snapped at Rey more than once to concentrate on what she was doing.  Naturally, she snapped right back, going so far as to walk away from practice for a time.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben glared momentarily at Chewie before returning to the cockpit, sitting in the pilot’s seat, moodily watching the stars zip by.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I miss you.  I’m sorry I walked away from you.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I miss you, too.  As annoying as it is, Chewie’s just trying to protect you.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Protect me?  Protect me from what?  </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben didn’t reply to see if Rey would figure it out.  It was something he himself had realized, and with it came a little stab of betrayal straight to his heart.  Chewie trusted him - but only to a certain point.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You mean, he’s trying to protect me from you?  But that’s absurd!  You wouldn’t hurt me.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You know that, and I know that.  Obviously, Chewie doesn’t.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Well, he can do his best to keep us apart or chaperone us, whatever, during the day.  I’m not letting you attempt to sleep without me there.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A thin, melancholic smile curled a corner of Ben’s lips at the fierce determination in her mental voice.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>It’s probably best not to push it, Rey.  I don’t relish spending the next several days in close quarters with a hacked-off Wookie.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>And I don’t relish seeing you suffer at night.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I’ll be - </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Fine, yes, I know.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Once you’re ready, practice with the remote again.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>What about you?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Maybe I’ll wander the ship or something.  Meditate.  I don’t know.  I’ll figure out something.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Does it surprise you as much as it does me that we’re able to talk like this without the necessity of the link opening?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I have noticed that.  Or maybe the link’s opening has become subtle enough we haven’t noticed.  Usually when that happens, though, I can see you or I’m with you.  We’re definitely apart right now.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Exactly.  Just so you know, I didn’t do anything to open my mind to yours.  I just happened to think it and you answered.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben mulled that over a minute.  In normal situations, they were unable to communicate this way.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>It comes back to a high emotional state, I think.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Probably.  Alright.  I’ll try practicing again.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben slouched in the seat, propping his crossed ankles on the main console.  One elbow propped on the seat arm, he absently rubbed his chin, and allowed the darkness of space to lull him into a sort of hypnotic state.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>As Ben had predicted, that night, Chewie insisted they each take watch in shifts - just in case they ran into trouble.  Putting off attempting to sleep, Ben insisted Rey take the first shift.  She gave him a look that clearly said she knew what he was doing, threw Chewie a mild glare, then headed off.  With any luck, she’d actually be able to rest.  Chewie, also, headed for his bunk.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When his turn rolled around, Chewie brought Rey to the cockpit.  Ben didn’t feel the least bit tired.  No, just the opposite.  He felt wired, full of energy with no real outlet for it.  He didn’t bother lying down.  Not even the lure of lying on the same bunk Rey had occupied enticed him to try.  Instead, he sat on the cold, metallic floor, folded his legs and tried to meditate, hoping that would bleed off some of his excess energy and calm him enough to get at least a little sleep.  The effort ended up wasted.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The following night wasn’t any better.  So much energy ran through his body, Ben could have sworn someone had given him a stimulant of some sort.  He thought about running through lightsaber cadences but his hands shook so much that he would more likely do himself harm.  So, he spent his portion of the night lapping the ship, climbing into all the crawl spaces, checking out the secret compartments.  If he thought it would keep him awake, he did it.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The third night, Ben knew he’d have to surrender.  He’d pushed himself as far as he could; he had no more energy left.  He couldn’t even begin to imagine what would plague him in his dreams, but he’d be finding out really soon.  Collapsing onto the still-warm bunk, he fell instantly asleep - only to startle awake again.  The image of himself using the Force to break someone’s neck because the person had defied him had flashed into his mind’s eye.  There and gone.  The next time it happened, he’d seen himself standing idly by while his Knights took out entire families for their disloyalty to the First Order.  These quick visual flashes occurred several more times, the last being a vision of Rey, dead by his own hand.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span> That one shook him to his very core.  Ben threw an arm over his eyes as he tried to get air into his lungs and calm his racing heart.  He heard the swish of the door opening but didn’t dare move.  He barely hung onto his control as it was.  From a short distance above him, he heard the sweetest sound he’d ever heard.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey, scoot over.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His throat worked as he tried to speak and only managed a hoarse, “Rey?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, I’m certainly not Chewie.  Now, scoot over.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What are you doing here?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I kind of thought it was obvious.  I don’t care what Chewie says.  You need sleep and you’re not getting it the way things are going.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>So, she’d seen his dream-visions.  Or, maybe she’d simply sensed his constant waking.  Ben sighed wearily, really not wanting to say what he was about to.  “Both of us aren’t going to fit.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We’ll get creative.  Scoot over or I’m climbing over you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rolling to his left side, Ben slid as far over to the bulkhead as he could to make room for her.  There really wasn’t much space left.  Rey climbed in next to him, lying on her right side, slid a knee between his and draped her free arm around his waist.  Scooting as close to him as she could - which meant a piece of paper wouldn’t have fit between them - she tucked her face into his chest, using his arm as her pillow.  With his free arm, he hugged her, partially to keep her from rolling off the bunk, but mostly because it felt good to do so.  Utter relief at being able to hold her again swept through him, a contented sigh leaving his lips.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“See?  I told you we’d make it work.  Now, sleep.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Those were the last words he heard for many slumber-filled hours.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When next Ben’s eyes opened, a few things made themselves instantly known.  The muscles of his entire left side protested mightily when he tried to move.  He hissed as he slowly shifted to his back.  Rey, obviously, had gone.  His throat felt as if the twin suns of Tatooine had taken up residence there.  His stomach growled nearly non-stop.  Last but not least, his mind felt sluggish again and had to fight to clear it.  Fatigue still nibbled at him but the solid hours of sleep had kept it from consuming him completely.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Pushing himself upright, he propped his elbows on his knees, dropping his head into his hands, groaning at the pounding in his temples.  He despised this feeling, of having slept too much but not nearly enough.  Only one way to fix it.  Getting to his feet, he swayed slightly, suddenly dizzy.  Okay, that was new.  He hadn’t felt that the last time.  He made it halfway across the room before the door slid open, Rey framed in the doorway.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hey.  I was just coming to check on you.”  She studied him closely, her gaze flitting around his face, and frowned.  Joining him in the middle of the small room, she met his gaze.  “You don’t look as good as I hoped.”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben’s first inclination was, of course, to declare himself to be fine, but he knew he had to look as bad as he felt.  If that was the case, lying wouldn’t do any good.  Even if he </span>
  <em>
    <span>appeared </span>
  </em>
  <span>fine, lying wouldn’t have worked; Rey would have known.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I admit, I don’t feel as well as I did the last time.  How long have I been out?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her hands gently cupped his face, her thumbs lightly tracing the shadows under his eyes as she gazed at him in concern.  “Prolonged sleep deprivation.  You only had one day’s worth of recovery the last time and now this.  Don’t worry, you’ve only missed twenty-four hours.”  Snaking a supportive arm around his waist, she draped his other arm over her shoulders.  “Come on, let’s get some food into you.  Then, it’s straight back to your bunk.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Food sounds good.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once he had some food and drink in him, his dizziness receded a little, as did his headache.  “Any alarms I should know about?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No, it’s been rather boring, actually.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben expelled a breath in amusement. “Long trips normally are.  I’ve always hated them.  On a Star Destroyer, there’s at least a </span>
  <em>
    <span>chance</span>
  </em>
  <span> of finding something to occupy yourself with.  Here, you’re fairly limited.  What did you do?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Especially when you’re the Supreme Leader, right?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben looked up from his meal, not sure how to respond.  Amusement glinting in her eyes teased a tiny smile from his lips.  “Right.  More trouble than I ever thought it would be.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“As far as what I did, I practiced.  I meditated.  Played a few games of Dejarik with Chewie.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben winced.  “You let him win, didn’t you?  He gets thoroughly annoyed when he loses.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey simply shrugged.  “I didn’t have to.  He completely trounced me each time.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I hate to tell you, but he may have cheated.”  A loud, protesting roar filled the galley as Chewie entered.  Not bothered in the least by the Wookie, Ben finished eating, casually adding, “You’ve been known to.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chewie launched into a long, drawn-out litany of apologies for what he had put Ben through over the course of the previous days, claiming to understand better just what the bond meant.  Lifemate was the term he used, and Ben agreed that it was exactly the right interpretation of his connection to Rey.  He found it difficult to suppress a grin when Chewie’s apologetic tone turned sullen as he spoke of Rey snapping viciously at him just before she had left the cockpit.  Ben could guess that was just before she had joined him.  Her defense of him, even against Chewie, sent waves of soft warmth radiating through him</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, you deserved it,” Rey insisted.  She waved a hand in Ben’s direction.  “Look at him.  Does he </span>
  <em>
    <span>look </span>
  </em>
  <span>alright to you?  He hadn’t even recovered from the last time.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>He </span>
  </em>
  <span>is sitting right here, remember.”  Two sets of eyes landed on him - and, of course, that’s when his brain decided it needed more oxygen.  He suppressed a sudden yawn but knew he hadn’t hidden it at all.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey jumped to her feet.  “Okay, back to bed.  You won’t be doing anyone any good, least of all yourself if you don’t get more rest.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He wanted to argue the point, but he couldn’t.  She was right.  If he wasn’t back to normal by the time they arrived at Rago, they’d never make it to Ilum.  Although, he supposed, Rey </span>
  <em>
    <span>could </span>
  </em>
  <span>get them there.  After telling Rey to go ahead,  Ben turned his attention to Chewie.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“If something breaks us out of hyperspace, let me know.  I mean it, Chewie.  Depending on where we are when it happens, I’ll probably know more about the area than you or Rey do.  Give me your promise.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once it was given, Ben took care of some personal needs before returning to the bunk room.  He joined her on the bed.  “How do you want to do this?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey twirled her finger for him to give her his back.  “First things first.  You were favoring this side.  I figured your muscles must have practically seized up from lying on your left side so long.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben drew in a sharp breath at the unexpected feel of her hands on him, skin to skin.  One hand rested along his back, while the other cupped his ribs.  He was all for allowing her to ease his muscle strain but if she had to touch skin to do it, well, she wasn’t reaching anywhere but his back.  Her hands </span>
  <em>
    <span>there</span>
  </em>
  <span> was enough to jump-start his imagination.  No way could he allow her access to anywhere else, or his promise not to push her into anything just might be broken.  A mental image of her hands on his thigh nearly had him groaning and furiously trying to think of something else so Rey didn’t pick up on his thoughts and feelings.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Sorry.  I should have warned you.  What your muscles need is heat, radiating heat, to loosen up.  Skin to skin contact is best for that.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben swallowed, his throat suddenly dry, and licked his lips. “It’s fine.  Anything will help.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Soon, a knot-releasing heat built beneath her hands and slowly dispersed upward to his shoulder, all along his side, and down over his hip to his thigh and calf.  It felt so personal, as if it were Rey’s own fingers massaging him, that he actually shuddered.  He couldn’t think like that, couldn’t let on the effect it was having on him.  The hand on his back slid upward an inch or two, the fingers against his ribs splaying wide in almost a caress.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Momentarily giving in to the sensation, he ducked his head.  The soothing heat languidly worked on his neck and he let out a sigh, followed quickly by a little moan as the heat really began to work on his thigh muscles.  He actually gasped when the heat flared inward over his hip, setting his heart racing, his breath shortening.  He should end this.  Call it good enough.  But he couldn’t do it.  It felt too incredible.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Slowly, the healing heat dimmed, leaving little tremors in its wake.  Ben missed it immediately.  Several moments passed and Rey still hadn’t removed her hands from him.  Torture and bliss.  Now that he was all worked up, Ben doubted he’d sleep at all, too aware of Rey in his arms.  Her left hand skimmed along his ribs up to his chest, and Ben gulped again.  They were reaching exceedingly dangerous territory.  He </span>
  <em>
    <span>had </span>
  </em>
  <span>to put a stop to things now while he still could.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Just as he opened his mouth, Rey spoke.  “Better?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben squeezed his eyes shut.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Better?!  </span>
  </em>
  <span>Said in that husky, I-feel-it-too voice?  How in the galaxy could it possibly be better when she said it like </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span>?  How could one ordinary word sound so … seductive?  He wanted nothing more than to spin around and kiss her as thoroughly as he’d ever done and take things further than they’d ever been between them, but it was too soon for that, right?  Yes, he loved her.  He’d realized that not long before their duel on Kef Bir when she impaled him on his own lightsaber then promptly healed him.  His heart hadn’t been in the fight.  The hand at his chest lightly skimmed down over his abs.  A helpless noise escaping him, he turned to Rey and kissed her, unleashing everything inside him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She met him with her own eagerness, which did nothing to dispel the sensuous fog that seemed to have taken him over.  It had been too long since he’d tasted her lips, felt her tongue dance with his, and he couldn’t get enough.  Pulling her roughly against his chest, he cradled her head as he trailed hot kisses over her jaw, down her neck and back again.  Suddenly, an influx of desire bled through their bond, blending with and intensifying his own.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Rey!  Speak now if you don’t want where this is going.  This may be the only chance you have.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her response was to shift her position so that she straddled him and pushed him onto his back, kissing along his jaw up to that little spot behind his ear that made him shiver.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>More!</span>
  </em>
  
  <em>
    <span>Touch me, Ben!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Well, that couldn’t have been any clearer.  His hands jumped to do her bidding, finding and massaging nearly every bit of heated skin they could.  Her hips contacted his and what little breath he had </span>
  <em>
    <span>whooshed</span>
  </em>
  <span> right out of his lungs on a moan filled with desperate need.  Rey’s echoing sentiment sent Ben’s self-control right out the airlock.  Wrapping his arm about her hips, he pulled her hard against him, pressing upward with his own.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh, Gods, Ben, do it again!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Gladly!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He rocked against her again, another deep moan escaping him as she increased the pressure, her damp heat easily seeping through their thin layers of clothing.  His heart pounding, and struggling to get enough air into his lungs, Ben continued to kiss everywhere he could reach, just as he continued the movement of his hips, desperate for relief, certain the entire ship would combust into flames if it didn’t happen soon.  Or, maybe just he would.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Gods, Rey!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t stop, Ben!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Won’t!  Can’t!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey’s hips pressed harder against him, speeding up the rhythm.  Her breathing caught, Ben felt her tense, her hips grinding against his.  And then … </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>BEN!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Heat.  Wetness.  His name echoed in his head as she flew apart in his arms.  Ben’s grip on Rey tightened convulsively, his hips jerking spasmodically against her twice more before the pressure that had built up finally released.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>REY!</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Sensation after exquisite sensation.  Labored breaths.  Hearts racing.  Hands clutching.  Muted sounds of supreme satisfaction.  For long moments, that was all Ben knew.  All too soon, the experience was over and reality crowded in.  Still attempting to catch his breath, he lay still, afraid to move.  While he’d thoroughly enjoyed what they’d shared, he felt rather … self-conscious … regarding his actions, how … out of control … he had been.  He feared now that they were no longer </span>
  <em>
    <span>in the moment </span>
  </em>
  <span>that Rey would have regrets and would resent him for letting it get that far.  Rey moving caught his attention.  He thought she wanted to leave and felt a quick stab of pain around his heart.  Instead, she simply shifted until she half-lay over him, pressing a gentle kiss to his temple, her free hand threading into his dampened hair.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Stop thinking so hard, Ben.  You’re giving me a headache.  You should know I wanted that as much as you did.  In fact, I look forward to doing it again.  But right now, one of us really needs to go to sleep, seeing as he’s utterly relaxed now.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Did you just manipulate me?”  The thought that she had gone through with it just to get him to relax hurt more than he thought it would.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What?  No, of course not.  I may have been a little more personal with the healing, the application of the heat, but that was because I wanted to be.  I couldn’t help myself.  I had a reason to touch you, skin to skin, somewhere other than your hands or your face.  It was something I’ve wanted to do for a while.  No more talk.  Sleep.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A silly grin stretched Ben’s lips wide.  She’d wanted to experience that, had started it even.  The best part, she wanted to again!  She’d get no complaints from him!  The hand in his hair lightly tapped his head.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re still thinking.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben opened his mouth to respond but yawned instead.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s more like it.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her fingers gently running through his hair lulled him to sleep.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>By the time they reached Roga, Ben had recovered from his lack of sleep.  Despite not having repeated a particular nighttime activity, he felt emotionally closer to Rey than ever and knew she felt the same.  He could feel her emotions as surely as he felt his own.  He often wondered if their bond had opened and remained so.  He found himself using any excuse to brush her arm or her shoulder, as if he simply </span>
  <em>
    <span>had </span>
  </em>
  <span>to touch her.  Rey felt the same.  Her hand often grazed his shoulder, the back of his neck, or buried itself into his hair.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, Chewie, I need you to switch places with Rey.  She’s taking us the rest of the way.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey whirled to face him.  “What?  Are you out of your mind?  I’ve never been there before.  How could I get us there?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“The Force will guide you.  Actually, you’ve almost been there.  Ilum isn’t that far from Exegol, oddly enough.  Relatively speaking, that is.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey looked at him as if he really had lost his mind.  “What?  The Sith planet is close to the one the Jedi use to get their crystals?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben shrugged.  “It’s about balance within the Force.  You know that.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, but - ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Just relax, Rey.”  Softly, almost hypnotically, Ben continued his instructions.  “Close your eyes.  Reach out to the Force.  Listen for it.  Feel it.  Don’t think about anything else.  Let </span>
  <em>
    <span>it </span>
  </em>
  <span>move your hands and be your eyes.”  Ben motioned with his head for Chewie to leave for the moment, knowing how disconcerting it was to attempt something while being watched.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Ben?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Still here.  I’m not going anywhere.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you sure I can do this?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben grinned, though she couldn’t see him.  Her hands had already begun directing them to Ilum’s coordinates.  “You already are.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Several hours of fancy flying, dodging all manner of cosmic obstacles later, the Falcon touched down gently on the icy planet’s surface next to the entrance of the Crystal Caves.  Coming out of her Force trance, Rey blinked, stared out the cockpit, then whirled in her seat to face Ben.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You mean I did it?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Of course you did.”  With a bit of a teasing smile, Ben added, “You should trust me more.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I do trust you!  It’s just … to bring us here when I have never been here before … ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey paused in her enthusiastic gushing, taking note of Ben’s expression, a curious feeling of … melancholy … coming from him.  It dawned on her that he probably hadn’t returned here since Luke had brought him.  Her heart went out to him.  It couldn’t be easy being here again, dredging up all of those old memories.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Why did you bring me here?” she asked in the silence.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>To his credit, Ben was genuinely surprised by her question.  “What?  Why wouldn’t I?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Leaving her seat, Rey straddled his lap as best she could, her hands meeting at the nape of his neck.  “Come on.  You know why.  Why would you bring me here when there are perfectly good crystals to be found elsewhere?  You could have avoided a lot of bad memories.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He offered her a soft smile, a hand burying itself in her hair, hair she’d taken to wearing down around her shoulders since that morning he’d said he’d liked it.  “Believe it or not, coming here to get the crystal I used for my first lightsaber is actually a good memory.”  He shrugged a bit sheepishly.  “Call it tradition.  I thought you would appreciate coming </span>
  <em>
    <span>here </span>
  </em>
  <span>to harvest your first.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Staring into eyes the color of dark chocolate - a confection she had discovered since joining the Resistance and had grown to love for its bittersweet taste - Rey saw nothing but sincerity shining back at her.  She’d once looked into those eyes and thought them as blank as the space between stars.  Then, her Ben began to emerge and she could see the sweet amongst the bitter.  And now, here he was, bringing her to a place of tradition, despite it reminding him of less-than-happy times.  Sweetness, indeed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>On impulse, Rey leaned forward and leisurely kissed him, conveying without words what his thoughtfulness meant to her.  Moments later, she ended the kiss, dropping her forehead to his.  “Thank you.”  Standing, she held out her hand.  “So, what do we have to do?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Humor glinted in his eyes as he took her hand and said, “First, we put on our winter gear.  It’s freezing out there.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey wandered the labyrinth that was the Crystal Caverns, searching for the one crystal that was to be hers.  She and Ben had split up soon after entering the main cave.  She hoped he was having better luck than she was.  Her problem was her lack of focus.  She kept getting distracted by the sheer enormity of the twisting caverns, the gorgeous, clear crystals poking out of the frozen ground in every direction in a number that boggled her mind.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And then there was Ben.  Specifically, the intimacy they had shared a few nights ago.  She couldn’t stop thinking about it.  Never in her wildest imaginings had she ever thought it would feel like </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span>.  Growing up a scavenger, information, she had learned, could be just as valuable as old ship parts.  If not more valuable.  She’d seen more species mating than she’d ever cared to and had traded on that information for necessities.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Then</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she had thought the act cold and impersonal, a means to an end.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Now</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she knew nothing could be further from the truth - and they hadn’t even engaged in the full act yet!</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The things she’d felt on both the physical and emotional planes had overwhelmed her enough to bring tears to her eyes, though she’d hidden them until she was certain Ben was sound asleep.  Not that she regretted the experience.  She’d told Ben the truth.  She was eager to feel that way again.  To know she could give him a similar experience filled her with a glow, a sense that she truly was special to someone in the universe, special in the way one person wishes to be to another.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Since that night, she’d had this inexplicable urge to touch him and often.  It didn’t have to be much.  Just a graze of her fingers on his arm or running her fingers through his hair - which, along with his eyes and his hands, she absolutely loved - appeased that need.  Ben felt the same; she knew he did.  Every time he passed her, she felt his fingertips skim her arm, her shoulder, wherever.  Even when his attention was on something else, he never missed an opportunity.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She now understood him on a level she hadn’t expected.  She felt his emotions as if they were her own, loud and clear, stronger than before.  Their bond apparently had changed yet again.  It had opened and had remained so, tethering them together.  It had its ups and downs, for sure.  Feelings were magnified, now, and would likely build upon each other.  They would need to remember that.  Thoughts, too, seemed to be easily shared, though that started before their intimacy.  It just appeared to be stronger now.  Sometimes, she found it nice not to have to verbalize what she felt, but other times, it would be nice to have some privacy.  Ben still thought they could find a way to block or suppress their connection for a period of time.  It would just take some experimentation.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey shook her head, realizing she’d been standing in the same cavern for several minutes.  She chuckled at what Ben would say if he knew she’d allowed her mind to wander again.  She could even hear the words in his soft voice, he’d said them to her often enough.  Or, was he actually telling her to focus?  She concentrated, hoping to get some clue as to which it was.  Nothing.  Must have been just her mind using his words and voice.  Okay, this could get very confusing, very quickly.  Reaching out with the Force, Rey continued on her quest.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The crystal that called to her surprised Rey.  Instead of the typical small, roughly teardrop shape that most Jedi used, hers was longer, more of an obelisk.  Brushing aside her emotions, she sat on the cold floor of the cavern, cupping the crystal she’d harvested in both hands, closed her eyes, and began the mediation exercises that would allow her to bond with the crystal and for it to take on the color of its bonded.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Becoming aware of her surroundings again, Rey looked down at the crystal in her hands - the now </span>
  <em>
    <span>yellow </span>
  </em>
  <span>crystal.  She looked closer at it.  Yellow with a tiny layer of green along the edges.  Yellow?  With green?  Having studied the ancient texts on Ahch-To, Rey knew yellow to be rare and to be the color of the Jedi Sentinels, the once-guardians of the Jedi temples.  They valued the </span>
  <em>
    <span>study </span>
  </em>
  <span>of the Force as much as they valued the </span>
  <em>
    <span>use </span>
  </em>
  <span>of it.  They were described as pragmatists who had picked up life skills outside of the Force.  Nothing she’d read had said anything about a secondary color.  Was it due to the bond she shared with Ben?  Did that mean his was green?  Green was often the color for teachers, consulars, negotiators.  In other words, those who tended to be patient and diplomatic.  Not something she’d associate with Ben, except for the teacher part.  He was only patient with her.  She put it out of her mind for the moment.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Eagerly, Rey pulled the strap of the satchel that held the lightsaber parts from over her head and off her shoulder.  Though her hands shook with excitement, she forced herself to be methodical while building her hilt.  The last thing she wanted was to do something wrong and have it blow up in her hand.  Putting the last piece into place, she studied the hilt.  While mostly silver, black and brass pieces accented the pommel.  Thin strips of slightly raised, rounded black material stretched along the middle section of the hilt for hand grips, bookended by thin rings of brass.  The crystal compartment contained all three colors, the ignition switch being silver.  Rather than a flat, circular tip, hers had a short scoop-style tip that sat above the switch.  She stood and hit the ignition switch.  Her blade hummed to life in a remarkable sunny yellow, tinged with peridot green along the edges.  Running through a few quick cadences, she found it felt more like an extension of her own hand … as it was supposed to.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A huge grin in place, she deactivated it, then sprinted back to the entrance, letting the Force direct her to where she needed to go, wondering if Ben had returned.  Reaching the Falcon, she heard a loud zapping sound, like electricity exploding, quickly followed by a string of curses.  Well, that answered that.  Ben </span>
  <em>
    <span>was </span>
  </em>
  <span>back, but it didn’t seem as if he was having any luck.  The smell of ozone as she boarded hit her like a wall.  How long had he been at it?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finding him in the lounge, broken and burnt pieces scattered on the table, Rey watched from the doorway as Ben attempted another configuration - only for it to short-circuit before ignition.  Another volley of curses followed.  For a long moment, he simply glared at the uncooperative hilt.  Sensing his high frustration, Rey approached as softly as she could, hoping to lend a little silent support.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His attention shifted to her as she neared, his lips curling in … pride?  “You made it back.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I did.  I see you’re having a hard time, though.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben shook his head.  “You first.  Let’s see it.  I know you’ve been anxious to know what color your crystal would be.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Holding her lightsaber aloft, Rey thumbed the ignition, paying close attention to Ben to gauge his reaction.  His eyes widened, jaw dropping open.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Two? That’s unheard of!  I should have guessed yellow would be your color.  The green, I’m curious about.”  Ben eyed the hilt.  “Nice job.  How did you manage to harness all the power through it?  That’s my problem.  Everything keeps frying when I ignite it.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Shutting off her weapon, Rey hung it on her belt, folded an arm on Ben’s left shoulder and propped her chin there, studying the chunks of metal, the fingers of her other hand toying with the hair at his neck.  Ben’s heat and the smell of his skin distracted her and she boldly turned her head to plant a few little kisses behind his ear, delighting in the shiver that went through him and the way he tilted his head away to give her better access.  In another instant, she found herself sitting across his lap, his lips meeting hers in a fevered kiss.  The need for air eventually had her pulling away, bringing back clearer thinking, an idea occurring to her.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Is yours standard size or longer?”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A wave of embarrassed amusement that wasn’t her own hit her full-force, heat radiating from him as his entire face colored.  Ben cleared his throat.  “I’m, uh, not sure how to respond to that.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Confused, Rey stared at him.  “What?”  It dawned on her what she said, how it could be taken considering what they’d just been doing - and what they had done in the past.  Blushing furiously, she added, “Your crystal.  Is it longer or more of a standard size?”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She blushed even redder.  That didn’t really sound much better.  With a humiliated groan, Rey dropped her head to Ben’s shoulder.  Said shoulder began to shake, Ben’s entire body shifting as he leaned forward on one elbow, his head dropping into his hand.  Shortly thereafter, Rey giggled, which only made Ben laugh harder.  She joined him, letting the awkwardness that had just occurred wash away.  Chewie walked into the lounge, tilted his head as he obviously tried to comprehend what was funny, and walked right back out.  This only made them laugh harder.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Gasping for breath and clutching her abused stomach muscles, Rey swiped at the tears that had spilled onto her cheeks.  Attempting to take a deep breath, she started again.  “Okay, let me try again.  The crystal I have is shaped like an obelisk.  I only assume its larger size allows it to handle more power.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben leaned back in his chair, reached up and buried his hand in her hair, while absently toying with her fingers with his other hand.  “That explains why yours works so well.  Mine is … typical.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey groaned and muttered, “I’m never living that down.”  For some inexplicable reason, her mind conjured up the memory of his red lightsaber.  Sitting upright, she asked, “Out of curiosity, why did you go with the design you had for Kylo Ren?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She felt him briefly tense at the mention of his former persona, and she thought maybe she shouldn’t have asked, but he replied.  “The crystal was cracked.  There was too much power running through it so I had to … I’m such an idiot.”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Cupping her cheeks, he pulled her in for another fierce kiss, which Rey enjoyed immensely.  All too soon, it was over.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re a genius, Rey.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How’s that?  All I did was ask about your other design.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t you see?  It’s the only way for the crystal to handle the strain of our combined power.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Catching on, Rey slid into the chair beside him.  “Well, this should be interesting to see.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Watching Ben work was like watching an artist.  Those large, capable hands bending things to their will.  Those long, nimble fingers manipulating tiny pieces into place.  As if it had just happened, she remembered the feel of those hands gliding over the skin of her back and shoulders, then around to her abdomen </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>night.  They hadn’t gone higher than that nor had they ducked below her waistband, but now, oh, how she wanted to feel his hands in </span>
  <em>
    <span>both </span>
  </em>
  <span>places.   The thought of those thumbs teasing her nipples hardened them under her tunic top.  She could almost feel his fingers questing beneath her waistband, finding her heat.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben fumbled the hilt, dropping it with a clunk onto the tabletop.  Trembling hands picked it up again.  Wait.  Trembling?  Rey’s eyes widened.  Oh, no!  She hadn’t, had she?  Reluctantly, she lifted her eyes from his hands and found his hunger-darkened gaze on her.  Then, they dipped lower, and Rey knew she had, in fact, managed to bombard him with her thoughts and feelings.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, Ben.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Completely mortified, Rey did the only thing she knew to do.  She bolted.  She bolted right for the ramp and off the Falcon, back into the caverns.  Maybe the iciness could cool her down so Ben didn’t have to suffer through her thoughts and could get his lightsaber built.  Rounding a corner, she braced against a bare patch of wall and sat, feeling like a burden.  Her vision swam as tears leaked from her eyes.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Rey, don’t cry.  It’s okay.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey looked up at the figure of Ben crouched on the ground in front of her.  She knew he hadn’t followed her, so their bond must have activated fully.  “Of course it isn’t okay.  How can you say that?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben shifted to sit beside her.  “Because it is.  This sharing of thoughts and feelings will take getting used to, but we </span>
  <em>
    <span>will </span>
  </em>
  <span>adjust.  We can work on putting up mental blocks on the way back to Coruscant if you want.  Personally, I’m just glad it’s me you were thinking about.  I don’t think I could stand being connected to you while you had those kinds of thoughts about Dameron or someone else.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey swiped at her tears even as she scrunched up her face.  She pretended to gag.  “Gee, thanks, Ben, for putting </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>thought into my head.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben draped an arm across her shoulders and pulled her close.  Rey turned into the embrace and buried her face in his shoulder.  She held onto him, her hand slipping partway into his collar, her thumb caressing his neck.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Rose said he’s interested in me,” she admitted quietly.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, I sort of picked up on that.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Did you?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben shrugged his unoccupied shoulder.  “It wasn’t hard to figure out.  His friend routine was a bit extreme.  Even someone like me with absolutely zero experience with that could tell.  No Force ability needed.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Feeling better just being held by him, Rey attempted a joke.  “So, it’s only </span>
  <em>
    <span>my</span>
  </em>
  <span> mind you’ve strolled through, then.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Her lame attempt had the opposite effect on Ben.  He tensed.  “Rey - ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Forget it.  I was joking.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re not planning on hiding out here until I finish the lightsaber, are you?  It’s really cold and you left without any of your gear.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No, I’m coming back.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Good.”  With that, he stood, walked a few paces away and disappeared.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Whenever you’re ready to follow through on those thoughts of yours, let me know.  I’ll gladly oblige.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey chuckled at the cockiness she heard in his voice.  Two could play at that game.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Only if you let me reciprocate.  </span>
  </em>
  <span>While he didn’t mentally respond, she did feel desire filter through the bond.  It was all the answer she needed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>BR</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey still didn’t understand how Ben could be so calm and accepting of their bond’s newest manifestation.  He’d lived with someone in his head for </span>
  <em>
    <span>years</span>
  </em>
  <span>!  Now that Snoke was gone, he should crave the privacy he hadn’t had, shouldn’t he?  After all, the voice may be different but the situation was the same.  But no, instead of being thoroughly irritated that his thoughts were still not his own, he welcomed her intrusions, whether they were intentional or not.  It just didn’t make any sense to her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You said it yourself, Rey.  I’ve lived with someone in my head far longer than I have without.  I can’t even remember what it was like before.  If I were alone in my head, I think I would go insane at this point.  Much too quiet.  Besides, you’re not like him, so don’t you ever compare yourself to him in any way again.  If having you means I also have you in my head, then I have no complaints.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey grinned as she made her way back to the ship.  Rather than answering, she sent her gratitude and love flowing in his direction.  Stepping on board, she realized just how cold she was as heat enveloped her like a warm blanket.  Heading for the galley to get something hot to drink, she tiptoed through the lounge so as not to bother Ben, a soft smile curving her lips at his expression of complete focus, his hands flying confidently over the pieces and tools.  Almost tempted to watch, Rey decided against it.  A repeat of earlier was not what either of them needed.  She still had no idea what color his lightsaber would be; she hadn’t seen his crystal anywhere amongst the handle pieces on the table.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Clutching her mug, she heard Chewie clanging around in the back of the ship, no doubt making sure all of the circuits were still in proper working order.  Extreme cold was not exactly forgiving to such sensitive parts.  Heading in that direction, Rey thought to offer some help.  If something needed to be rigged together, she could probably figure out how to get it done.  Han, himself, had creatively wired the Falcon on numerous occasions.  She’d seen his handiwork.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Everything alright, Chewie?”  The Wookie’s echoing response came from a maintenance hatch in front of her.  “Oh, that can’t be good.  Do you need some help?”  Another echoing response.  “Of course I don’t mind.  I can rig things together just as well as Han could - and maybe better, considering some of the rig jobs I’ve come across on this thing.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The next few hours were spent with Chewie testing and maintaining the more sensitive equipment on board the Falcon.  A sudden sense of triumph, followed quickly by a healthy dose of shock, then pride, swelled through Rey and she froze where she was, looking off in the direction of the lounge.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>At Chewie’s question, she beamed over at him.  “Ben’s finished.  He’s really happy so it must have turned out well.”  Chewie made a shooing motion in her direction.  “But I’m helping you!”  He shooed at her again, sounding insistent.  Rey grinned.  He was right.  She really did want to see Ben.  “Okay.  Thanks, Chewie.  Why don’t you start getting the Falcon prepped for takeoff?  There’s no reason to stay any longer.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dropping her empty mug back in the galley, Rey wound her way back to the lounge to find Ben running through a few cadences with a </span>
  <em>
    <span>blue </span>
  </em>
  <span>lightsaber blade and crossguard beams.  Blue tinged with … green … on the edges, like hers.  Blue fit him rather well, in her opinion.  The color of the Guardians.  Ready and willing to take on all comers.  Bold.  Brash.  Flashy lightsaber play but highly skilled.  Even a bit cocky.  Yes, blue was perfect.  The green, though.  On his, it was a darker shade, closing in on a teal color.  Highly unusual.  The only reason she could think of was because of the bond they shared.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>On impulse, Rey ignited her own weapon and intercepted one of his slashing movements.  She grinned when his brows rose in challenge.  And there was that cockiness she’d come to love.  So began a close-quarters, </span>
  <em>
    <span>controlled </span>
  </em>
  <span>game of attack and deflect.  Their fun lasted approximately two hours before mutually calling it quits.  Out of breath but excited over Ben’s accomplishment, Rey powered off her lightsaber and practically launched herself into his arms, wrapping her own around his neck.  He caught her about the waist easily, his own weapon deactivated, just as she’d known he would.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I knew you’d get it!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Thanks to you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey shook her head.  “I didn’t do anything.”  With one finger, she tapped his temple.  “Your solution was right here all along.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The sight of Ben’s face so alight with joy lured her in; she simply couldn’t stop herself.  Not that it really mattered.  She’d barely moved when he brushed her lips with his, teasing them open.  Rey gladly complied with his wish, a little sigh of satisfaction escaping her.  His tongue barely passed over her lower lip before retreating, so she chased it.  Feeling herself being lifted a little higher, she automatically wrapped her legs around him.  Just like that, the leisurely kiss morphed to a more passionate version.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With only a vague sense of further movement, she found a hard bulkhead at her back and an equally hard but delicious Ben pressed against her front, chest to chest.  His panting breaths feathered across her heated skin as he moved to trace the column of her neck with his lips, sending little shivers of delight down her spine.  Another little sound of pleasure escaped between her lips as she tilted her head back to give him more space with which to work, her fingers tangling in his hair, her nails scraping along his scalp.  His moan rumbled in his chest as it fought to bring in sufficient air.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Oh, how she ached for him, </span>
  <em>
    <span>needed </span>
  </em>
  <span>to feel him against her.  Reflexively, she tightened her legs around him, pressing her hips forward, whimpering a little in dissatisfaction.  When his lips returned to hers, she wasted no time taking them, seeking his taste like a parched man sought water, swallowing his low moan in response to her zeal.  Still, it wasn’t what she needed.  Or rather, not </span>
  <em>
    <span>all </span>
  </em>
  <span>that she needed.  Rey was certain of only one thing.  She’d burst into tears of frustration if she didn’t get what she needed soon.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>All of a sudden, his hands were at her legs, attempting to unlock them from his back.  He was stopping?  Now?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Loosen up a little for me, Rey.  Trust me.  Please.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She did trust him.  The hungrily added ‘please’ convinced her.  Against every instinct that screamed for her to hold tight, Rey loosened her legs the slightest bit, but it was enough.  His hands gripping her knees at his hips, she slid lower and … Oh, Gods!  Too far gone to worry about the greedy, wanton sounds coming from her or how desperately she ground her hips against his, she took what she wanted, reveling in the overwhelming sensations and Ben’s own responses.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The pressure mounted.  Rey bucked her hips faster.  Her breath caught.  Her entire being trembled.  Then … release.  “Oh, Gods!  Ben!”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Wave after wave of the purest of pleasure pulsed from her center out to her limbs, curling her toes in her boots, tightening the fingers in Ben’s hair.  Passionate cries she couldn’t hold back escaped between her lips as she rode out her release.  Ben’s movements became frenzied for a moment, and she held onto him as tightly as she could.  Then, a series of deep guttural moans accompanied the rhythmic thrust of his hips, shudders running through his tall frame.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey couldn’t say how long she lived in that state of absolute bliss.  All she knew was that it felt more intense than before.  Eventually, the tsunamis of sensation gave way to gently lapping waves and she all but collapsed, feeling like a puddle of bacta solution.  If it weren’t for Ben keeping her up, she was certain she’d have plopped right onto the floor, no energy to stop herself.  Speaking of Ben …  Her heart pounding and lungs working overtime, she opened her eyes.  At some point, he had dropped his head to the bulkhead beside her, his uneven breaths brushing her jaw and neck, his body wracked with tremors.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Damn, Rey … That … That … ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey weakly nodded then gently kissed his temple.  “I know.”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And she did.  There were simply no words to describe the experience.  Little by little, she felt herself being lowered to the floor.  The instant her feet touched down, her knees buckled, but Ben’s quick reflexes caught her around her waist before she got too far, lifting her again.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What I’ve always wanted.  You falling at my feet.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Still a little breathless, Rey laughed.  “If only you’d known what it took … ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben chuckled softly.  “I’m not sure what I would have done with that information.”  He leaned in and gently kissed her.  “Now, however … ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A sudden memory surfaced and Rey leaned back.  “Wait.  I seem to recall having already fallen at your feet once.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A furrow knitting his brow, Ben stared down at her.  “What are you talking about?  I would have remembered something like that.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, you definitely had a hand in it, then, too.”  Finding his confusion amusing, Rey grinned.  “Maz’s place.  You took me back to your ship.”  Feigning indignation, she added, “You Forced me to sleep!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben’s expression instantly cleared, two bright spots of color blooming on his cheeks.  “Oh.  Right.”  He ducked his head but looked up at her hopefully, a tiny grin playing about his lips.  “Sorry?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey snorted, tucking her face into his neck.  “You were forgiven a long time ago.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“As I recall, you got your payback when we dueled.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Remembering that fight and the number of shots she’d managed to land on him, Rey winced.  With a trembling finger, she lightly traced diagonally over the bridge of his nose, down his cheek, beneath his jaw to his neck, remembering the scar he had once borne because of her, and she peeked up at him apologetically.  “Sorry?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben chuckled, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead and echoed her words.  “You were forgiven a long time ago.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>About that time, Chewie came through on his way to the cockpit and voiced his displeasure at finding them as they were.  Once back on her feet, Rey busied herself picking up the discarded pieces Ben had tried while building his lightsaber, too embarrassed to face Chewie after her and Ben’s latest dip into the intimacy waters.  Really, it was a good thing the Wookie hadn’t come by any sooner.  She studied the hilt of his newly crafted weapon.  His was, unsurprisingly, mostly black.  Silver rings accented the bottom near the pommel.  More created the hand grip.  He, too, opted for a silver switch.  Just below the crossguard, were two slightly wider rings of silver.  Two black knife-like blades swooped from the hilt and extended along each quillon, culminating in a sharp point just past the quillon tips.  Huh, that was new.  Three thin bands of silver accented the quillons, with one on the main section.  All three tips were vented all around, the ends resembling a circle of claws or talons.  It definitely looked fierce and deadly, worthy of the man wielding it.  Chewie let out another lecturing growl, catching Rey’s attention.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben huffed in irritation.  “What, Chewie?  We weren’t doing anything but talking!”  After another round of irritated grunts and growls.  “Enough, Chewie.  And yes, get us ready to go.  There’s no need to stick around.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey bit her lip to keep from laughing.  Really, it was too much.  Getting caught by Chewie once was bad enough.  To almost let it happen a second time … ?  They should have known better than to get carried away but there just didn’t seem to be any way to stop.  When their emotions combined, they were impossible to resist.  Despite all of that, she still found it funny.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Once Chewie left, Ben turned to her.  “Well, that was close.”  Bridging the gap between them, he loosely wrapped his arms around her.  “Ready to go back?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey mirrored his actions and looked up to meet his eyes.  Faced with the reality of going to the remnants of the Galactic Senate, she worried.  “Ben, maybe we shouldn’t go to Coruscant.  We can go anywhere.  They likely wouldn’t find us.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“No.  I’m not running, Rey.  I’ll face whatever consequences I have coming to me.  It’s the right thing to do.  I’m not going to let you and Chewie become outlaws, always on the alert for those who want to take you down.  Believe me, it’s no life to have.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“But at least you’d </span>
  <em>
    <span>have </span>
  </em>
  <span>one!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“They won’t kill me, Rey.  The dyad wouldn’t allow it.  I die, you die, too.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What?  I </span>
  <em>
    <span>did </span>
  </em>
  <span>die!  So did you!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Not entirely.  Neither of us could have or the other would have been gone instantly.”  He shrugged.  “It’s the only thing that makes sense.”  Leaning down, he kissed her forehead.  “It’ll work out.  You’ll see.  Come on, let’s get strapped in.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben started to walk away before he turned and held out his hand.  That gesture had taken on so many different meanings.  Just as she’d claimed not so long ago, Rey took his hand.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ben’s </span>
  </em>
  <span>hand.</span>
</p>
<p>
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</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
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</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
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</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Believe</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>… Unless you let go … forgive yourself … forgive the situation … realize the situation is over, you cannot move forward.</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <em>-- Steve Maraboli, Unapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience</em>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ben?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben’s eyes shot open.  He knew that voice, one he had never thought he’d hear again.  Looking over his shoulder, his eyes widened.  Carefully extricating himself so as not to wake Rey - which was a very tricky thing to do all things considered - he stood and joined the ghost of his mother by the door of the cabin area.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Mom?”  In that moment, he wanted nothing more than to feel her touch as he had felt his father’s.  Remorse and guilt threatened to swallow him whole, two tears slipping beyond his control.  “I’m so sorry, Mom.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>As if she’d seen his thought, she lifted a hand to slide lovingly along his cheek.  “I know you are, my son.  I’m sorry, too.  I thought I was doing the right thing, sending you to Luke.  I guess I did the right </span>
  <em>
    <span>wrong </span>
  </em>
  <span>thing.  My decision facilitated everything that came after.  I failed you, Ben, but I believe I was supposed to.”  Her eyes darted past him a moment.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben sniffled, glancing over his shoulder at the bunk before returning his gaze to his mother.  “Rey.  The dyad bond.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His mother nodded, a rueful smile on her face.  “The moment I met her, I knew there was something special about her.  The Force was incredibly strong with her.  As time wore on, I could sense that she saw </span>
  <em>
    <span>my son</span>
  </em>
  <span> in the person he had become.  She didn’t talk about your encounters with anyone … except me.  She assured me that my son wasn’t gone, that he was simply lost, and that she could and would bring him back.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben tearfully chuckled.  “Sounds like Rey.  She never let up.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“She was right not to.  She’s your match in every way possible.  The Force had </span>
  <em>
    <span>chosen </span>
  </em>
  <span>her to be your other half.  The bond you share was prophesied millennia ago to bring ultimate balance to the Force.  Just remember, good cannot exist without evil.  I’m afraid your work isn’t quite done, but this time, you’ll have each other every step of the way.  There’s not much I can tell you about your bond that you don’t already know, only that it will continue to strengthen and grow.  Take care of each other and the bond will take care of you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Mom, if Rey and I truly do form a dyad, then why did she die while I still lived?  I know she did.  I </span>
  <em>
    <span>felt </span>
  </em>
  <span>it, like I was being torn apart.  Why did I die?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His mother chuckled.  “I was afraid you’d ask me that.  I’ll explain as best I can.  It wasn’t exactly death that you felt.  Or, not a purely physical one.  Those who are strong in the Force, as you know, become one with it when they pass on.  What happened to Rey, her spirit, that which made her Rey, was so completely broken that she may as well have not existed.  You would have followed her soon after if you had not acted as quickly as you had.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben peeked at the still-slumbering Rey and he randomly wondered what his mother thought of finding her there.  Nothing had been said yet so he figured it didn’t bother her.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Turning back around, he said with conviction, “Good.  I wouldn’t want to live without her.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know.  That’s how it should be.  Your love for her and your bond helped you to heal her, to make her whole again, but it took so much out of you to do it.  I was ready, however.  She fought for you.  Valiantly, but she was weakening.  The galaxy was going to lose you both unless I stepped in.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>All the air in his lungs rushed out in one giant exhalation when Ben realized precisely what his mother meant.  “You … You pushed me back to her.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I did.”  Her brows rose as she smiled up at him.  “One of us Skywalkers deserved to live the happy life we should have had.  It was the only way to make up for all the mistakes I made.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben swiped at the salty wetness on his cheeks, unaware more than the initial two tears had fallen until that moment.  “Mom … ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A ghostly hand rose to rest against his cheek.  “As you once advised Rey, let the past go.  You are not who you once were.  Remember that and the night terrors will cease.  Until then, do what works for you.”  Her ghostly appearance began to fade.  “I never stopped loving you, Ben.  Be happy.”  Then, she was gone.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben rubbed at his eyes, sniffling.  “I am, Mom.  Happier than I’ve ever been.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey’s half-asleep voice came from across the room.  “Ben?  Are you okay?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Returning to the bunk, he climbed in, gathering Rey back into his arms.  “I’m fine.  Go back to sleep.”  Though he tried to stay awake to contemplate the things his mother had told him, he soon lost the fight and joined Rey in slumber.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>----</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>What?!</span>
  </em>
  <span>” Rey yelled, leaping to her feet.  “How can you ask that of him?  He risked his life to save mine!  How is that not enough for any of you?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The ‘request’ hadn’t taken Ben by surprise.  After the warning from his mother that their work wasn’t done, he’d been expecting something like this.  “Rey - ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Fire blazed in Rey’s hazel eyes when she whirled to face him.  “No, Ben.  This is completely unfair.  You can’t do it.  You shouldn’t </span>
  <em>
    <span>have </span>
  </em>
  <span>to.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben stood, facing Rey, and brought his hands up to lightly cup her face.  “Remember what I told you?  She said our work wasn’t done.  I think she meant this.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey gripped his wrists, fear in her eyes.  “But you left that life behind.  You’re not </span>
  <em>
    <span>him </span>
  </em>
  <span>anymore.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben smiled tenderly down at her.  “No, I’m not.  Thanks to you.  And I won’t be again, because I’ll have you with me to make sure of it.”  A sudden thought filled him with anxiety.  “Unless you couldn’t bear to see that uniform again.  I’d understand, of course.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Just as he’d hoped, the fire and determination returned to her gaze, hardening her expression.  “You’re delusional if you think I’m going to let you do this alone.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m also sending Dameron, Finn, and Chewbacca with you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben shifted his attention to the head of the Galactic Senate.  “You want me to return to the Knights with </span>
  <em>
    <span>four </span>
  </em>
  <span>known Resistance fighters?  Rey’s presence would be easy enough to explain.  All of the Knights are Force-sensitive to a degree.  A small one, but it’s still there.  There’s no way they’d accept the presence of three known to many as being affiliated with the Resistance.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’ll find a way.  That’s the deal.  Bring Ren back and successfully complete this mission, then afterward, Kylo Ren will be officially declared dead.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“If he doesn’t die before then,” Rey spat out.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The Senator turned her expressionless mask onto Rey.  “He has a choice.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey snorted humorlessly.  “Oh, yeah, some choice.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Before Rey could get herself into trouble, Ben gave the governing body his decision.  “I’ll do it.  I’ll need time to recreate the uniform, rebuild the helmet.  I hope you have decent transport that is not affiliated with the Resistance.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You have a choice between the Outrider or the Falcon, I’m afraid.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben let out an irritated breath.  None of them seemed to have thought this through.  Typical of the Republic.  Cobble together a plan and hope it worked.  The Empire and the First Order had better strategizing than this.  One of the few areas where they actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>were </span>
  </em>
  <span>superior.  He shook his head and waved a resigned hand.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Fine.  The Falcon it is.  I’ll come up with something convincing.  Is there anything else?  I need to begin.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Given the nod to leave, Ben walked out the meeting room door, Rey hot on his heels.  He didn’t need the Force to tell him she was worried.  For him, personally, or for the mission itself, he couldn’t say.  Underneath the fear, he knew lay anger.  Anger at the Senate for forcing the issue, and at him for accepting it.  Like she had said, he had little choice.  They would have tried him for all his crimes, locked him away with Force binders, kept him in a Geonosian Containment Field ala Count Dooku and Kenobi, or kept him in a cell with ysalamiri.  He shuddered.  None of those options sounded pleasant.  He glanced sideways at Rey.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Rey?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m not mad at you, Ben.  They didn’t give you much of a choice.  I’m mad at them for not giving you a chance.  I don’t see how you doing this is going to convince them when saving my life wasn’t enough to.”  She stopped mid-corridor.  “I feel so … let down.  I thought that once the war was over, things would change, but nothing has.  They’re still more concerned with politics and appeasement instead of what’s right.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s typical of a governing body, Rey.  I’ve seen it time and again.”  Ben looked around them a moment and sighed.  “I’m not fond of dragging along Dameron and Finn on this.  The fewer people involved the better.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey massaged the back of her neck.  “I know.  Especially considering Poe’s hostility towards you.”  She suddenly grinned rather impishly.  “You could present them as prisoners you captured during your escape from us, stealing the Falcon in the process.  You could keep them bound, in a cell or something.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Impressed with her thinking, Ben’s brows rose, a full smile stretching his lips.  “I like how you think.  I should have known you had a devious streak about you.  I think that will be exactly how we play this.  The Knights would accept that story, especially if I make it known I plan to ransom you.  It’s historically what the Knights have been known for.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“How many Knights are there?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben, aware of the many stares and curious looks, began walking again, heading for the main doors.  “That’s a carefully guarded secret.  I </span>
  <em>
    <span>can </span>
  </em>
  <span>say that the few you have seen are a small number.”  Finally stepping out into the bustling metropolis, Ben took a hopeful breath.  “Now to track down the necessary people who can help recreate what I need.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>----</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Two weeks.  That’s all it took to receive an exact replica of his - no, Kylo Ren’s - wardrobe.  One of those weeks was spent just finding a trustworthy individual who could get his hands on the correct materials for each article.  Then, of course, was the mask and getting the voice modulator just right.  The second week was spent waiting for the wardrobe’s completion.  All in all, amazingly quick, in Ben’s opinion.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Now, here he was, in his quarters, the delivery of said wardrobe having been made.  The box still sat on the table, untouched, dread making his stomach churn.  He really didn’t want to don those things again, actually feared becoming Kylo Ren again despite his assurance to Rey that he wasn’t concerned.  He feared he’d lose himself in the charade.  Acting the part convincingly without falling victim to it was a fine line Ben wasn’t certain he was prepared for.  He also had his doubts as to whether Rey was prepared to see him in those clothes again.  Would she still be able to separate him from the garments?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Of course, I will, Ben.  I saw </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>you</em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span> in them long before you did.  Nothing will change that.  And I promise, you won’t lose yourself in the role.  I won’t let that happen.  Even if I have to constantly be yelling in your head to stop, I’ll do it.  You and I, we’ll prove to everyone who you truly are.  Trust me.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Turning away from the scenic skyline outside his window, Ben softly smiled.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>There you go, throwing my own words back at me.  Thanks, Rey.  Well, I can’t put it off any longer.  I need to make sure it all fits properly and looks right.  Sorry to interrupt.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh, no, you don’t!  Do not touch that box until I get there!  You’re not going through all of that alone.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Determinedly, Ben approached the sealed box and reached for it.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Rey, I don’t need - </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Suddenly, Rey was there next to him, swatting away his hand.  “I want to be there, Ben.  I have a feeling it’s going to affect us both.  I’d rather just deal with it together.  So, wait for me.  Please.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Exhaling through his nose, Ben relented.  “Fine.”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Truth be told, he really didn’t want to be alone then, either.  Stupid, he knew.  They were nothing more than textiles.  Harmless.  Yet, somehow, they had a hold over him.  He shook himself of his thoughts and realized Rey had disappeared.  Pacing back to the window, he watched thousands of people going about their little lives, completely oblivious to the sacrifices recently made on their behalf, and those yet to be made, blindly trusting those in power to have their best interests at heart.  Oblivious or just not caring as long as their lives weren’t interrupted.  Ben found the idea a bit depressing.  Rey was right about more than the government.  The general population’s attitude hadn’t seemed to have changed.  Then again, it was probably just himself who had.  He had thrived on that kind of apathy.  When a population didn’t care what happened to it as long as their lives didn’t change, ruling was easy.  Now, it simply irritated him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A chime sounded that let him know someone was at his door.  Tapping the panel, he stepped back to allow Rey entrance.  She certainly hadn’t wasted any time getting there, probably afraid he’d go ahead without her.  She’d been with Rose that afternoon, taking a break from training to catch up with her friend.  Her eyes landed on the innocent-looking box before she turned to meet his gaze.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Let’s do this.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Right.  Ben broke the seal, slowly opened the flaps and, with a slight hesitation, reached inside.  The helmet sat atop the pile of black material.  Pulling it out, he did his best to inspect it clinically.  It appeared correct.  He’d have to wear it to be certain.  Peeking at Rey, he saw her eyeing it, but for once, he couldn’t tell what it was she was thinking or feeling.  Nothing came through their bond.  Setting it aside, he picked up the box.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Running his teeth over his lower lip, he swallowed with difficulty.  “It might be easier if I just put them on.  I’ll be back.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>In his bedroom, he set the box on his bed, pulled out the various articles, then inhaled deeply, attempting to dredge up the attitude needed to convince his Knights that he hadn’t changed.  Pulling off his shirt, he exchanged it for the linen, close-fitting undershirt with padded sleeves for a little extra protection.  He traded his light-weight, loose-fitting trousers for the form-fitting leather pants.  Next, came the high-necked padded gambeson and belt.  Pulling on the knee-high boots, he completed the ensemble by throwing the billowing cloak around his shoulders and pulled on his gloves.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dressed this way … it didn’t feel as foreign as he’d expected and it worried him a little.  If he wasn’t bothered by wearing these clothes, that meant he wasn’t as far removed from Kylo Ren as he’d thought, didn’t it?  How tempted will he be to fall back into his old habits?  Shaking those thoughts from his mind, he left his bedroom, attempting to emulate his old attitude and the way he had carried himself.  Rey had been holding his mask, scrutinizing it carefully, but set it down when she heard him and turned to face him.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben stood ramrod straight, feet shoulder-width apart, hands at his sides, as her eyes raked over him, from his boots slowly upward to meet his eyes.  He couldn’t deny he was terrified of what he would see in them.  She gulped and his heart sank.  It was too much.  Too many bad memories.  Suddenly, a flood of desire rushed into him as Rey approached him, wearing a familiar expression.  He couldn’t believe it!  She didn’t find him repulsive in these clothes?  When she reached him, he looked down at her, uncertain as to what he should do.  She solved that by pulling his lips to hers and hungrily kissing him.  He didn’t understand it but pulled her closer.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Eventually, Rey ended the kiss, her eyes somewhat glazed as she looked up at him.  “Well,” she said hoarsely and cleared her throat, “I knew seeing you in that would have an effect, I just wasn’t prepared for </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>one.”  Her hands traveled over his chest.  With a grin, she added, “You must have twisted me up, after all, for me to find you sexy in </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben stared incredulously down at her a moment before breaking out into soft laughter and hugging her to him again, absolutely relieved she could still see past the clothes.  “If you have that reaction every time you look at me during this mission, we may have to change our story.”  His amusement faded as he stared into Rey’s eyes, a gloved hand lifting to cup her cheek.  “I’m glad seeing me dressed like this hasn’t brought back any bad memories.  I don’t think I could take you looking at me like you used to, like I was a monster.  Not now.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, I didn’t know you then, but you don’t have to worry.  I look at you and all I see is Ben in Kylo’s clothes.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I hope you can still say that once the acting begins.  It has to be convincing, Rey.  I </span>
  <em>
    <span>have </span>
  </em>
  <span>to sound as if I mean every word I say.  I will even be forced to do some things that will be questionable.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m well aware of that, but as you said, it’ll be acting.  I’ll </span>
  <em>
    <span>know </span>
  </em>
  <span>that it’s acting.  That’ll be the difference.  I’ll prove it to you.  Put on the mask.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben, again, stared down at Rey in apprehension.  He supposed, though, that he would have to wear it sooner or later and she’d see it on him at some point.  It might as well be now so they could be ready for whatever reactions may come.  Dropping his arms from her, he reluctantly approached the mask that had silently mocked him the moment he set eyes on it again.  Taking a deep breath, he took it in hand.  There had been a time when he had looked down at the mask and had taken pride in what it represented.  Now, it simply made him ill.  He forcibly swallowed again.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It won’t change you, Ben,” Rey said softly from his side.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When had she joined him by the table?  A soft touch of her hand against his back, more of a caress, really, prompted him to work the mechanism that released the faceplate.  Hesitating for half a second, Ben pulled it onto his head with practiced ease.  Reworking the little mechanism to set the faceplate back into place, he kept his back to Rey, unable to face her.  Reaching over his shoulders, he grabbed the hood of his cloak and pulled it up.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re trying to hide again.  Talk to me.  I can feel your unease, Ben, your worry.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Talk to me.</span>
  </em>
  <span>”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am </span>
  </em>
  <span>uneasy,” came the carefully modulated voice Ben was all too familiar with, his worry still bleeding through.  “It makes me uneasy to realize that I don’t feel so far removed from … him … as I thought I was.”  He suddenly spun away, stalking to the window before turning back to face Rey.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Almost angrily, he went on, “If I’ve truly turned my back on what I had become, then why do I feel a certain amount of … I don’t know, relief?  Comfort?”  He closed his eyes, turning his head away, not wanting to see any censure in her expression.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben felt more than heard Rey’s soft approach and turned to face her fully.  Looking into her hazel eyes, he saw no hatred in them, no revulsion.  Compassion, for him, for his predicament, glittered in them instead.  He had felt humbled by her before but nothing like this.  How she could look beyond the outer trappings and see what lay beneath after everything he’d put her through was more than he could comprehend.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Coming to a stop in front of him, she boldly looked up at him, not flinching in the least.  “I’ll tell you how, Ben.  The mere fact that you’re concerned tells me that you </span>
  <em>
    <span>have </span>
  </em>
  <span>left that life behind.  I can sense your own revulsion for the acts you committed and for what you held dear.  That tells me that underneath all of this,” Rey waved a hand, encompassing the full uniform, pushed back the hood, “that my Ben is here,” She tapped the forehead area of the mask, then lay her palm over his heart, “and here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The love Ben felt coming through the bond nearly overwhelmed him in its strength and certainty.  Her Ben.  His eyes flooded with tears and he let them run unchecked, safely hidden.  Roughly, he pulled Rey into his arms, desperately holding on to the one good thing in his life.  He wished he had the words to tell her everything he felt when she looked at him.  Oh, he knew he didn’t have to say them, that she knew very well what he felt, but to be able to express himself verbally?  Rey deserved that and so much more.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Swallowing past the lump that had formed in his throat, he at least tried to tell her.  “Rey, I - ”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>His door chime sounded.  Feeling Dameron and Finn outside his door, he sighed.  He’d been expecting this visit from them for the last two weeks.  What he wanted to say to Rey would have to wait.  Using the Force, he pressed the button to open the door.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What the - ?!” Poe went for the blaster at his side only to have it ripped from his hand.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Come in, gentlemen.”  Easily catching the blaster he’d summoned, he admonished the other man.  “Do you not recall the first time you shot at me?  It didn’t go so well for you then, just as it wouldn’t now.”  He handed the weapon to Rey, who was staring down Dameron as she used to look at </span>
  <em>
    <span>him</span>
  </em>
  <span>.  “Hold this.  We wouldn’t want any misunderstandings leading to unfortunate events.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey took the blaster, crossing her arms over her chest.  “Come in so the door can close.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finn glanced between the three of them, looking rather nervous.  “So, uh, what’s with this mission we’ve been recruited to complete?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dameron mirrored Rey’s stance, his feet shoulder-width apart.  “And why was </span>
  <em>
    <span>he </span>
  </em>
  <span>put in charge?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey huffed in irritation.  “Not that the reason matters, but ultimately it’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>his </span>
  </em>
  <span>life on the line.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben, enjoying Dameron’s unease, decided to leave his mask on a little longer.  “Have you heard of the planet Rattatak?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Instead of answering, the ace pilot glared at Ben.  “Are you going to insist on wearing that this entire time?  If you’re not Ren anymore, I’d have thought you’d want to wear that as little as possible.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With no small amount of smugness coloring his voice, head tilted slightly to the side - a gesture Kylo Ren had employed many times before and was subconsciously mimicking now - Ben asked, “Do I intimidate you, Dameron?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The man shrugged casually.  “I just prefer to look people in the face.  Hiding is just so cowardly.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Poe!  Shut your mouth or you won’t have to worry about what Ben can do to you.  I’ll do it instead.  We’re on the same side,”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Congratulations, Dameron, you just managed to kill us all.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Dameron’s heavy brows drew together.  “And how do you figure that?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Deciding enough was enough, Ben finally removed the mask, setting it on a side table before replying.  “By not knowing when to curb your tongue.  If you were to display that attitude on Rattatak in front of those who know me or even</span>
  <em>
    <span> of </span>
  </em>
  <span>me, I would be forced to hurt you.  Even then, they may question why I didn’t outright kill you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t you get it yet, Poe?  Ben has to </span>
  <em>
    <span>be </span>
  </em>
  <span>Kylo Ren again, which includes injuring when necessary.  If your attitude brings on any suspicion, we’re all dead.  If your mouth gets us into a situation in which weapons are drawn, we’re all dead.  Ben’s duplicity will be revealed because his lightsaber isn’t red any longer.  Do I really need to say it again?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“We’re all dead, I get it.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey nodded.  “Good.  I’m glad you’re finally starting to listen.”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>A few seconds’ worth of silence followed.  Ben thought, perhaps, Rey was finally getting through to the ace pilot.  If so, this mission just might succeed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So, what’s on Rattatak?  Why are we going there?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben shrugged off the cloak, carefully folded it and, crossing the room, returned it to the box on the dining table before answering the former stormtrooper.  “Mercenaries.  Weapons.  My Knights.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What?”  It came out as a squeak so Finn cleared his throat.  “I mean, what?  I thought they all perished.  Rey said you fought them on Exegol.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Desire came trickling through the connection he shared with Rey.  Looking over his shoulder, Ben found her heated gaze watching every move he made, her teeth barely visible as they gnawed her lower lip.  He nearly groaned as his own desire stirred.  The air almost sizzled with their combined emotions.  Color attempted to rise in his cheeks but he managed to - mostly - prevent it.  To give himself a little extra time, he removed his gloves, finger by finger, as well.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Sorry.  I just can’t help it.  You in leather … I like what I see.  If we were alone - </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben sucked in an uneven breath.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>God, Rey, don’t go there right now.  </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A throat clearing from his left reminded Ben he still had to respond to Finn’s declaration.  Trying to put their flooded bond out of his mind, he faced the dark-skinned man, not missing the scowling glance bouncing between himself and Rey from the Resistance’s ace pilot.  Dameron no doubt felt the tension in the air, had probably guessed the nature of it if that scowl was anything to go by.  No matter.  The man would have to deal with it.  Ben wasn’t about to curb his natural behaviors where Rey was concerned just to appease the pilot.  He couldn’t even if he wanted to.  More often than not, seeking her out when they’d been apart, the little touches, those things were done subconsciously.  He usually didn’t realize he’d moved until he suddenly felt whole again.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>To Finn, he said quietly, “I did.  A small number of them.  As long as the Knights of Ren have been around, do you really believe there is only a small band of them?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“There’s not exactly a lot known about them.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“There’s a reason for that, which I won’t go into now.  We’ve time for that on the journey there.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So, what’s our cover story, then?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey asked, “What were you told about the mission?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finn shrugged.  “Nothing.  Just to find you two.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Nothing the government did surprised Ben anymore.  It made sense, though.  If they feared there was a traitor in their midst, they certainly didn’t want to announce what it was they were about to do.  Speaking of traitors … </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Finn, I once considered you a traitor, called you such.  I was wrong and I do apologize.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>To his credit, the ex-stormtrooper met Ben’s gaze evenly.  Nothing was said a moment or two.  Finn, finally nodded.  “Apology accepted.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With the occasional clarification from Rey, Ben explained the mission’s details and the cover story that they had invented.  The two men’s objections didn’t come as a shock to Ben.  In their place, he likely would have loudly objected as well, but it was the only option they had.  Naturally, it was Rey who eventually calmed them down enough to think and agree it was their best strategy.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Chewie’s getting the Falcon ready now.  We’ll leave first thing tomorrow.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>----</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With five people aboard a ship meant to carry a maximum of six, to say it was crowded was a bit of an understatement and presented problems in regards to people with differing temperaments, two of which who barely tolerated each other.  When it came to privacy, there virtually was none to be had, which presented its </span>
  <em>
    <span>own</span>
  </em>
  <span> set of problems.  To Rey’s amusement - and relief - Ben made a few modifications to the Falcon’s interior.  In the lounge, extra seating in the form of a two-person settee was added, as well as a circular bench seat around the holoboard.  As for the crews’ quarters, Rey had discovered there had been an extra wide bunk in a smallish room sectioned-off from the others.  Ben had explained rather hastily and with high color that he hadn’t wanted to use it on the trip to Ilum because he’d assumed his parents had at one time.  Now, however, he’d made sure to revamp the space for the two of them.  It would certainly be much better.  More private.  She felt her face flush at the thought.  No way was she spending the entire mission without indulging in her and Ben’s version of intimacy.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Rey?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m fine, Ben.  Just thinking about the upgrades you made to the ship.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>For a moment or two, he didn’t respond and Rey wondered if he was attempting to reason out her feeling of embarrassment.  When his response did come, she easily heard the humor in his voice.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Ah.  Sharing one of those tiny bunks when it was just us was one thing.  Now that we have the other two, that’s not an option.  And I certainly don’t want to sleep without you.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I wouldn’t let you anyway.  Your dreams are improving but they’ve still been bad more often than not.  Even if they were good all the time, I still wouldn’t let you sleep alone.  Now, go back to your meditation.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I’m not sure I can now that you have me thinking about sleeping next to you.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey chuckled, the sound echoing slightly in the hold where she’d taken to going for some solitude.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>With the discipline you have, I’m sure you’ll manage.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>When it comes to you, Rey, my discipline seems to disappear.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey shivered.  Not from cold, far from it.  No, her shiver was in response to the heat in Ben’s voice.  Never had simple words sounded so … sensual.  Feeling his amusement through the bond, she huffed in mock irritation.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>As sternly as he’d often said to her, she parroted back to him.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>You’re not focusing, Ben.  You have to focus in order for it to work.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>But I am focused, Rey.  Completely focused.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You’re not supposed to be focused on me, Ben, </span>
  </em>
  <span>Rey said with a little exasperated laugh.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Oh.  Is that my problem?  Doesn’t matter.  I don’t think I can concentrate.  I’m feeling rather hungry now.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>You know where the galley is.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Ouch.  Spoilsport.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Nothing else came through, but Rey knew Ben wasn’t upset with her.  His voice practically swam in amusement.  She laughed and shook her head at their conversation.  Leaning back against a container of supplies, she closed her eyes and breathed deeply, allowing the light vibration of the ship to relax her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>----</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Okay, I think we’ve held off the questions long enough.  Where exactly is this planet?  What should we expect there?  What about the Knights?  I don’t like walking into a mission blind.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey frowned at Poe.  They’d barely sat down for dinner.  Things had even been fairly civil all day, which was remarkable in and of itself.  She had no delusions that it would last.  Their journey had just begun and it would take a little longer than the trip to Ilum.  That’s a long time for a nearly-full ship, especially with a couple of people who didn’t get along well.  No, Rey wasn’t happy with Poe for breaking the peace.  The least he could have done was wait until </span>
  <em>
    <span>after </span>
  </em>
  <span>they had eaten.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben pushed his plate away, folded his arms in its place.  “Rattatak isn’t far from Endor.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finn’s face lit up like a kid hearing his favorite story.  “Endor?  Where the Empire was finally defeated?”  It was almost humorous to watch his expression slide to embarrassment as he realized who he was talking to.  “I mean, uh … I’ll just shut up.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Yes, Endor.  Relatively speaking.  It’s in the same sector as Endor but it is slightly northwest.  Like I told you on Coruscant, it’s a planet of mercenaries and weapons.  They’re a ruthless, blood-thirsty people.  In fact, blood-sport is a planet-wide pastime.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, no wonder you fit right in.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Poe!  Quit it!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Poe merely shrugged.  “Consider it getting it all out now while I can.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Anyway, Rattatak is full of plateau canyons and dry gullies.  It’s mostly desert.  Sandy and rocky.  Red is the pervasive color.  In the land, the clothing, the spilled blood.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey snorted in amusement and stood to refill her cup.  Laying her hand on Ben’s shoulder as she passed him, she let it slide into his hair then trail away.  “Ben, when you offer a girl the galaxy, you should really take her somewhere that </span>
  <em>
    <span>isn’t</span>
  </em>
  <span> like her homeworld.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>At her words, Poe sprayed his drink across the table, missing Ben by inches only because Ben jumped out of the way.  “Sorry,” Poe croaked.  “But, uh, ‘offered the galaxy’, Rey?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey exchanged a wry glance with Ben, who responded to her mock admonishment.  “Does Ilum not count?  It’s the exact opposite of Jakku.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Gesturing with the hand holding her cup, she said, “</span>
  <em>
    <span>I </span>
  </em>
  <span>took us to Ilum.  You insisted on it.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben nodded his head in concession.  “Okay, but I got us most of the way there.”  Passing by, Chewie overheard and added his two credits into the conversation.  Ben huffed.  “Okay, fine, the ship did.  Happy?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey, fully aware that Ben was merely playing along, propped her forearm on his shoulder when she reached him on her way back to her seat and pulled a contemplative expression.  “Well, I suppose you </span>
  <em>
    <span>did </span>
  </em>
  <span>take me back to Ajan Kloss after Exegol and then to Coruscant after Ilum, so I guess you </span>
  <em>
    <span>have </span>
  </em>
  <span>taken me to planets opposite of Jakku.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben reached up and took her hand as she sat again.  “Don’t let Chewie hear you say that.  He’ll insist, again, that the ship did all the work.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Knowing that was true, Rey chuckled.  “Probably.”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Turning her attention to Poe and Finn she was met by two very different expressions.  Poe appeared as if he had swallowed something foul.  One corner of Finn’s mouth curled into a grin.  Then, she realized Poe had questioned her initial comment to Ben.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t worry about it.  Inside joke.”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The pad of Ben’s thumb caressed her palm.  Once.  Twice.  He squeezed her hand almost imperceptibly before letting it go.  Rey, however, wasn’t ready to be left alone.  Removing her arm from the table, she subtly reached over and draped it across Ben’s thigh, her palm cupping the inside of his knee.  She felt his surprise and hoped he didn’t mind.  She received her answer when he loosely laced their fingers together.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’ll only ever see six Knights at one time.  It’s how they keep up their mystique and how they grew their reputation.  It’s easy to intimidate when you seem to be in multiple places at once.  Each one uses a weapon and has a set of skills that are unique to them.  If one gets taken out, another will rise from the ranks and take his place, assuming the identity.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“So, they lose their identities.  They no longer exist,” Finn all but whispered.  Rey had no doubt he was thinking of his own experience.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben, too, seemed to know where the former stormtrooper’s thoughts had gone.  “It’s not like that, Finn.  Those who join the ranks do so voluntarily.  They know what joining means.  It’s a lifelong commitment.  New recruits train on all six weapon types until or unless they show an aptitude for one in particular.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Poe’s brows shot up.  “That sounds … reasonable.  That’s how most militaries are run, I believe.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben met Poe’s gaze dead-on.  “Surprising that you just might have something in common with an enemy, isn’t it?  Here’s something else that may surprise you.  They may be ruthless mercenaries, but they are a brotherhood.  One would willingly die for the other.  Their ship, The Night Buzzard, is a modified Oubliette-class transport with a forward and midship laser cannon turret and one rear heavy laser turret.  Two fixed rear-facing laser cannons complete its gun specifications.  I only tell you this in case we are forced to go up against it.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finn whistled in appreciation.  Poe nodded thoughtfully.  “Better to expect it than not.  More prepared that way.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben wore a tiny smirk as he said, “What do you know, we actually agree on something.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>At Poe’s disgruntled look, Rey nearly grinned but did give Ben’s fingers a quick squeeze.  Looking up at him, she asked, “Anything else we should know about them?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben met her gaze.  “As I said before, don’t be surprised if they recognize your abilities.  All the Knights are Force-sensitive to a minor degree.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“That doesn’t put Rey in danger, does it?” Finn asked.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben tensed, his jaw stiffening.  “If one of them tried something, </span>
  <em>
    <span>he </span>
  </em>
  <span>would be the one in danger.  You needn’t fear.  I’ll be certain they understand to leave all of you alone.  You’ll be considered high-value prisoners.  They won’t run the risk.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure of that, are you?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I assure you, Dameron, that those who knew me, knew of my temper.  They </span>
  <em>
    <span>won’t </span>
  </em>
  <span>risk it.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>----</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Two days later, while Ben was in the cockpit making certain all was still in order there and Finn was busy playing against Chewie on the holoboard, Rey stepped into the cargo hold she and Ben used for their practice duels.  Unfortunately, Poe decided to follow her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Heaving an exasperated sigh, Rey turned to face him.  “What is it you want, Poe?  If you’re here to spout more nonsense about Ben, then you can save your breath and leave.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What are you doing, Rey?  How can you consort with the enemy?  What has he done to you?  Are you sharing his bed?  I know you’re desperate for love but he can’t give it to you.  The Rey I know would never fall for his kind of lies and tricks.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Eyes flashing with her temper, Rey snapped, “You don’t know me at all!  How in the universe can you claim to know who I am deep inside when we’ve barely been around each other?  My relationship with Ben is none of your business!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey started to turn away but Poe grabbed her arm tight enough to bruise.  “Listen to me, Rey.  If it’s love you want, I’ll give it to you.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey winced, trying to pull her arm free, but he held it fast.  “Let me go.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Not until you listen to me.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>From behind her, Rey heard the unmistakable ignition and hum of a lightsaber before the blue blade appeared over her right shoulder, pointed with deadly accuracy at Poe.  “Unhand her.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Poe, gawking, his gaze jumping from the only entrance which happened to be behind him to Rey to Ben and back again, dropped Rey’s arm and held his hands up.  He backed up several steps.  Rey whirled to face Ben, whose hard gaze stared down the steady arm holding his lightsaber aloft.  Slowly, she reached out her hand to touch his arm, then stepped close to him to run her hands over his chest in awe.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re really here!  Poe can see you!  Ben!  How did you - ?  The bond?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben’s stony gaze momentarily flicked to Rey, one corner of his lips twitching ever so slightly before he returned his focus onto Poe.  “Don’t force me to consider you an enemy, Dameron.”  Taking a step back, Ben shut down his weapon and returned it to his belt before focusing on Rey.  “I felt your anger.  I was coming to see why you were so angry.  I had only taken two steps before I found myself here.  Did he hurt you?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Rey rubbed at the tender spot on her arm.  “Not intentionally.” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With a gentleness that defied the threatening look he sent in Poe’s direction, Ben pulled up Rey’s sleeve to find the reddened marks left behind.  Laying his hand over them, he healed them quickly.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Before Ben could say or do anything else, Rey looked over her shoulder.  “Get out of here.”  Not bothering to see if he complied, she stepped back from Ben.  “I need to burn off some anger.  Duel with me?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben’s response was simply to step back and ignite his lightsaber.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>----</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Poe backed up toward the door, watching the glowing sabers clash and whirl, coming disturbingly close to making contact.  Well, disturbingly close to Rey, at any rate.  He didn’t care if Ren was hit.  He hoped the man </span>
  <em>
    <span>did </span>
  </em>
  <span>get hit, actually.  The color change of Ren’s lightsaber meant absolutely nothing to Poe and couldn’t understand why it meant so much to Rey.  To Poe, a lightsaber was a lightsaber, the color of which was merely arbitrary.  He smirked when Ren had to hastily jump out of the way of Rey’s blade, only to suck in a quick breath when she came within a hair’s breadth of getting tagged, Ren’s, admittedly, impressive control the only thing that prevented it.  Poe sneered at Ren’s smug expression and cringed when Rey simply laughed, rolled her eyes, and shoved the blue blade from her with a sweep of her yellow one.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Turning on his heel, he stalked back through the doorway, unable to watch the two of them … flirt.  Just as they had done for the past two days with all those little touches.  Poe shuddered at the mere thought.  Repulsed by what he’d seen, he headed for the lounge and dropped into one of the seats with a heavy sigh.  Finn sat at the game table, a cup of something in his hand.  Chewie was nowhere to be found.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re going to have to let it go.  You know that, right?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Irritation flared, his heavy brows furrowing as Poe glared at his friend.  “No, I don’t.  I don’t see how you </span>
  <em>
    <span>can</span>
  </em>
  <span>!  I thought you were her friend.  How can you stand by and let her get involved with that monster?  Just because he’s taken off his mask, made claims that he’s changed, doesn’t make it so.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I </span>
  <em>
    <span>am </span>
  </em>
  <span>her friend, Poe, which is why I’ve listened to her and am perfectly fine with how things are now.  I’ve watched them both.  She’s happier than I’ve ever seen her and Ben, well, he looks at her like a man in love.  They share a bond, Poe.  She’s privy to his emotions just as he is to hers.  Besides all of that, if he hadn’t changed, his lightsaber color wouldn’t have changed.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Poe, still rather irritated, snapped, “What the hell does that have to do with anything?  How would you know anyway?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finn set down his cup, folded his hands on the table in front of him and looked his friend in the eye.  “I’ve done some reading from the Jedi texts Rey has.  They talk about the colors of a saber blade and what they mean.”  Finn leaned forward, his expression serious.  “Only those who allow the Dark side to rule them carry red lightsabers, Poe.  The crystal used to help power the weapon senses what’s inside the person.  That’s how the colors come about, except for the red ones.  Those are created by negative emotions like hate being forced into the stone.  So, the fact that his saber color isn’t red anymore is very telling.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Poe scowled, his arms folded over his chest, not quite ready to accept what his friend had told him.  “He’s taking advantage of her.  I mean, she’s practically a kid and you know as well as I do that they’re sharing the captain’s quarters.  You know what that means.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finn merely shrugged.  “Personally, I don’t care.”  He let out a huge sigh.  “Look, Poe, I know you like her.  You look to be about the same age as Ben, so that argument is as pointless as a parka on Jakku.  You just don’t want to admit that you’re not the one she wants.  You have to, though, if this mission is going to succeed.  Just watch her … and him.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Really </span>
  </em>
  <span>watch them with an open mind.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>With that little piece of advice dispensed, Finn took his cup to the galley and didn’t return.  Poe sat in his seat stewing over everything.  Heaving a huge sigh, he let his head fall back to stare at the ceiling.  Yeah, sure, Rey seemed happy, but he’d just assumed Ren had coerced her into acting that way.  He’d seen Rey mess with stormtrooper minds before, and Ren was likely even more powerful, so, surely, he was capable of it.  Was it possible that Finn, Rose, Admiral Ackbar </span>
  <em>
    <span>and </span>
  </em>
  <span>Chewie were all wrong?  He supposed the better question was </span>
  <em>
    <span>Was it likely?</span>
  </em>
  <span>  Poe wasn’t much of a gambling man - not like Han had been - but even </span>
  <em>
    <span>he </span>
  </em>
  <span>knew the odds were stacked against him.  Letting out another long breath, Poe went in search of Finn or Chewie to see if he could lend them a hand with whatever they were busy with.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Over the next few days, Poe actually followed Finn’s advice and paid close attention to Rey and Ren.  What he saw - what he allowed himself to finally see - was that he’d been so incredibly wrong.  He’d observed them training, with Ren instructing Rey on something or another.  Once, Rey stumbled and twisted her ankle fairly badly.  Enough to make him wince, at any rate.  As he watched, Ren instantly shut off his saber and knelt at Rey’s feet, gently taking off her boot, cupped his hands around her ankle and closed his eyes.  Rey’s pain-filled expression almost instantly cleared.  That was when it dawned on Poe that Ren had just healed Rey - and that he’d seen it before.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Back on Ajan Kloss, Rey had stumbled into the clearing after his and Ren’s confrontation.  Rey had told him then to let Ren concentrate, but he hadn’t realized what she’d meant and, frankly, hadn’t cared.  And, the man had done it again a few days ago when he’d materialized out of thin air.  The look Ren was giving her now was full of adoration.  But then, Rey said something that made Ren laugh, something Poe had been certain Ren incapable of.  Before the scene could devolve into something he didn’t really wish to see, Poe ducked out of the room.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The little touches between them, a brush against an arm or shoulder, was nothing more than he’d seen between Finn and Rose, if he were honest.  Half the time, neither Rey or Ren seemed to be aware of even doing it.  As one passed by, even while utterly focused on a data pad, a hand would shift to initiate contact with the other as if it was something pertinent to their survival.  Poe was beginning to think that little moment of contact actually was.  Rey’s entire being always seemed to brighten whenever it happened.  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Poe again found himself sitting in the lounge one evening contemplating everything he’d observed thus far when Rey dashed through on her way toward the quarters area.  Curious as to why, Poe followed behind - and wished he hadn’t when, in a scream more animalistic than human, Rey’s name echoed throughout the ship, the terror-filled tone sending shivers down Poe’s spine.  Just prior to the door shutting behind Rey, Poe caught a glimpse of Ren, and it shocked him.  The man sat on their bunk, shuddering, sweaty, struggling to breathe, his features twisted in absolute wretchedness that made Poe very uncomfortable.  When Rey sat next to Ren, the man clung to her, burying his face in her shoulder.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Turning away, he practically ran into Finn and Chewie and shooed them away.  “Rey’s got it handled.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finn’s gaze bounced between Poe and the door, confusion written all over his face.  “What was that all about?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Chewie pulled them away and back to the lounge.  Only then, did he answer Finn’s question.  Poe shuddered.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Nightmares?  </span>
  </em>
  <span>Now, he’d had some harrowing ones, that was for sure, but not one of them had ever had him sounding like that.  Shame threatened to swallow him whole when he remembered Rey saying something about the nightmares and his response had been to mock the guy for them, wishing they haunted him forever.  Now that his eyes had been opened, he could honestly say he wouldn’t wish </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>kind of visceral reaction on anyone.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Looking over at Chewie for confirmation, he asked, “Rey knew what was happening with him, didn’t she?  It’s why she ran by here in such a rush.”  The Wookie nodded his furry head and barked.  The bond.  Of course.  His brow furrowed as he contemplated the mission.  “But if this is what happens whenever he falls asleep, how is he going to manage when we go planetside?  Rey won’t be with him.  Have they thought of that?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Finn nodded, apparently thinking it over.  “That’s a good point, Poe.  We’ll ask them once they come back out.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>----</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The remainder of the journey passed in surprising civility.  The fact that Dameron actually apologized for his behavior and for the things he’d said absolutely shocked Ben, having never expected to hear it.  Rey, on the other hand, beamed at her friend, hugging him and thanking him for accepting their new reality.  Ben couldn’t be certain the peace would last, but he would do his best to be civil to the man.  He didn’t think he could ever consider the pilot a friend.  As the end of the trip grew closer, the more nervous Ben actually became and took to spending a lot of time in the storage turned training room either meditating or running through various lightsaber cadences.  He knew Rey believed she could keep him from fully sliding into Ren’s persona, but he just wasn’t certain she could.  He had to exhaust himself through physical activity every night so he could actually get some sleep.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Then, they’d arrived.  As he sat in the pilot’s seat, staring at the sandy yellow dustbowl of a planet shot through with dirty browns and rusty reds, Ben took a deep, calming breath.  Ready or not, the acting had to begin.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Ugh, what a fun-looking planet,” Poe quipped sarcastically.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It could be, depending on which side you’re on.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben felt the heat from Dameron’s unappreciative glare, but Rey snickered and he had to fight to keep a straight face.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>I don’t think Poe shares your sense of humor, Ben.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>It doesn’t appear so, no.  </span>
  </em>
  <span>  “Before we get close enough to be hailed, I need to prepare.”  </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He rose, dropped a kiss to Rey’s cheek, and disappeared from the cockpit.  Back in his and Rey’s quarters, he took another bracing breath before donning the uniform he’d be wearing for however long this mission took.  Only after hooking his saber to his belt did he don the helmet, pulling the hood of his cloak over it.  As he made his way back to the cockpit, Ben took the opportunity to reacquaint himself with his former persona, adopting the attitude and mannerisms he’d previously used, projecting as much arrogance as he could into his walk.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He reached the cockpit in time to hear a voice come over the comm.  “Resistance freighter, state your business and prepare to be surrounded and escorted planetside.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben sat in the pilot’s chair, a gloved finger hovering over the comm button.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>I have a bad feeling about this.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A reassuring hand landed lightly on his shoulder, then slipped beneath his cloak and attempted to slide underneath the gambeson he wore to no avail.  </span>
  <em>
    <span>Ugh, you wear way too many layers.  It’ll be okay, Ben.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Reaching up with his left hand, he clasped it tightly a moment, the squeak of the leather loud in the silence.  Mashing the comm button, he spoke with as much command as he could muster.  “This is Supreme Leader Ren with the First Order.  I have no business with you and do not require an escort.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A derisive laugh came through the comm.  “What’s </span>
  <em>
    <span>left </span>
  </em>
  <span>of the First Order, you mean.  Sorry, </span>
  <em>
    <span>Supreme Leader</span>
  </em>
  <span>, but your precious First Order has no influence here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ben’s temper flared at the mocking, his hand curling into a fist next to the comm button, until he felt a soothing brush of a finger against the skin of his other wrist, and he realized he still held Rey’s hand.  A wave of comforting warmth spread through him from their bond, calming his ire.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Activating the comm again, he inquired, “On whose authority are you acting?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Baroness Asajj Ventress,” the voice replied haughtily, obviously expecting them to be impressed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Ventress.  Now, </span>
  <em>
    <span>that </span>
  </em>
  <span>was a name Ben hadn’t heard in a while.  It did </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>bode well for their mission.  He had a </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>bad feeling about this.</span>
</p>
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